Review: Corrections in Ink: A Memoir by Keri Blakinger

 Dear Lit Loves,

After having devoured Orange Is the New Black by Piper Kerman when it originally was released, I had a similar curiosity about Corrections in Ink:  A Memoir by Keri Blakinger.  This memoir takes an inside look at addiction, self-destruction, prison, and redemption.  This book alternates chapters from the author's early life as a competitive figure skater who exits the sport and spirals down to the depths of addiction followed by chapters chronicling her arrest and time spent in prison.  There is no self-pity on the part of the author.  She owns her mistakes.  At certain points in the book, she very candidly admits to her regrets and also to how she survives life in prison along with observations of the vivid realization that prison is not rehabilitation but rather making a human being feel they have no value and are powerless.

The book's author, Keri Blakinger, loses her spirit when she leaves the sport of figure skating.  Figure skating was so much a part of her identity and without it, there is a loss of such magnitude that she looks for escape and finds it in life as an addict.  It is heartbreaking at times to read how an individual can self-destruct so completely and quickly yet also remain well-functioning enough to keep up her classes in college.  The reader witnesses Keri become more and more reckless while also surrounding herself with other addicts who contribute to her destructive spiral.  She hits rock bottom when she finds herself in a county jail awaiting her prison assignment.

In prison, Keri is exposed to fellow addicts and felons who have done some terrible things, but for the most part, Keri realizes the women who are in prison with her did not start out as terrible people.  Many of her fellow prisoners suffer from mental illness, have been victims of some form of physical or sexual violence, and come from poor backgrounds often not having obtained even a high school diploma. Keri begins to recognize that she could easily have been arrested long before she was.  She comes from a privileged background while many of her fellow inmates do not have the advantages she has enjoyed.  Throughout being in the grip of addiction, Keri's parents repeatedly pay for her to have place to live and also pay for her college education.  Her parents make sure the one good thing she accomplished during addiction is taken care of and returned to her upon her release from prison.  

Through the multiple prison transfers along with the relationships Keri has with the women she meets in prison, Keri begins to also observe how the U.S. prison system is designed to leave people living in fear, lose any sense of self-worth, and ensure that prisoners know how powerless they are.  Keri witnesses some haunting truths of life in prison as a woman:  the sparse and decaying living quarters, the lack of access to medical care, the vulnerabilities female prisoners have in relation to prison guards, the fear that comes with possibly receiving a disciplinary citation that incurs isolation, and the lack of any comprehensive programs to assist women in navigating life once they are released from prison.  

Upon her release Keri survives her time on probation, slowly learns to live in the outside world once again, avoids falling prey to addiction again, and discovers a talent that eventually gives her life meaning and enables her to make a difference for those who are incarcerated.  This is a profoundly moving book.  I highly recommend it to those in recovery from addiction and for those that are incarcerated.  For those of us that know neither of these realities, it is an opportunity to observe the precarious life of someone in the throes of addiction.  Readers also bear witness to a former addict and human being trying to serve her time in prison with all its pitfalls while slowly learning how to bravely reclaim her life and make a difference in the lives of others.  

A truly great read.

Best,

Grace (Amy)

Review: Honor: A Novel by Thrity Umrigar

Dear Lit Loves,

Wow.  This month my local book club selected a book I thought would be a quick and easy read, but it honestly was one of the most truthful, but painful books I have ever read.  The book is titled Honor by Thrity Umrigar and though it is a novel, it almost reads like a memoir due to its realistic portrayal of religions and culture wars.  Thrity Umrigar is a Professor of English at Case Western Reserve University and she has written eight novels.  The book centers around a foreign correspondent, Smita, who works for a U.S. newspaper.  Smita is called away from vacation by a colleague and friend.  Smita believes her colleague needs assistance during a surgery, but, no, her colleague needs her to finish writing the final articles on a case in India involving a young woman named Meena who is being punished by her Hindu brothers for marrying a Muslim man and bringing dishonor on their family and their village.

Initially, I knew there had to be more to the foreign correspondent's background because though it appears she lives in New York and is an American citizen, while in India she is continually having flashbacks to a period in her life when she and her family lived in the metropolitan city of Mumbai.  Smita also has some reservations about tackling coverage of a story involving a young woman named Meena who is the victim of hate crimes by her brothers.  Meena is part of a rural village, lives in poverty, and along with her sister Radha, worked in a factory essentially to support themselves and their two brothers.  When Meena decides to leave the family and marry a Muslim man named Abdul who believes they can be the example of a new India where people marry not because of their religion but because of who they choose to love, all hell breaks loose.

I should issue a warning that what happens with Meena and her brothers is brutally violent.  There were times I had to put this book down deliberately and come back to it at a later time.  Though the trauma is realistic given Meena's circumstances, it was still difficult to read what her brothers did to reclaim their family "honor".  And in no way whatsoever do I condone what happens to Meena in this book.  Honestly, I found it revolting.  Meena's brothers are never found guilty of their actions because the justice system where they live is highly compromised by bribery.  Smita, the foreign correspondent, who is covering the story, finds herself in the middle of the conflict and trying to bring Meena's case to a larger audience.  We also discover that Smita was a victim of religious/culture animosity when growing up as she once lived in Mumbai until her father found a way to move the family to The United States and find freedom while he began teaching religion at a university in Ohio.  

I do not wish to give away the complete story.  Smita and her protector and translator, Mohan, find themselves in a highly combative situation upon trying to save Meena from the wrath of her brothers who are found not guilty for what they did to both Meena and her husband, Abdul.  Meena also asks Smita at the climax of the conflict to take her child, Abru, to the States so she can live freely and without the persecution both Meena and Abdul have endured.  Obviously, this leads to its own crisis whereby Smita must decide how she will help Abru survive when she has no living parents and a mother-in-law who wants nothing to do with her.  

Smita's decision on how to do what is best for Abru is the gem of this story.  You have a female correspondent who has suffered trauma and persecution in India because of her father's writings and also because of the family's religion at a critical time in her life around the age of twelve or thirteen.  She is struggling with whether to leave Abru with Mohan who has connections in India and has lived there his whole life.  At the same time, Smita worries how she would care for Abru as a single woman who travels for work and is based in New York.  The ending of the book leaves the reader with hope and uncertainty, but that is how so much of life is these days.  And maybe that is what we are to take away from this book.  Life itself is filled with vast hopes and extreme uncertainties such that the best way to live and love is in the present while striving to live as honorably as we can.

This is most definitely a five star book.  I would alert readers to the more violent parts of the book, but the story is a realistic portrayal of what some Hindu and Muslim women have experienced as a result of the clash between religions, cultures, and family honor.   

Until My Next Review,

Grace (Amy)

Review: The Burning Light of Two Stars: A Mother-Daughter Story

 Dear Lit Loves,

Over the last two weeks I have been reading The Bruning Light of Two Starts:  A Mother-Daughter Story by Laura Davis.  Ms. Davis authored the bestselling book titled The Courage to Heal enlightening many men and women on ways to heal from the trauma of sexual abuse.  I selected this book because Laura Daviss pecifically addresses trying to reconcile a relationship with her mother after periods of estrangement along with detailing how she juggled assisting in her mom's care as her mother spent her final years living near her and suffering from Alzheimer's Disease.

Honestly, I know very few people who have not experienced some sort of "broken" relationship with a family member.  For Laura Davis, her struggle for reconciliation is with her mother who appears to not acknowledge that Laura's grandfather sexually abused her beginning around age three.  I do not know why Laura's mom, Temme, could not accept or validate that what her daughter was telling her about her grandfather's behavior was true.  There were definitely instances over a great period of time where Temme knew that inappropriate behavior on the part of her father did happen.  Sometimes a person prefers to live in denial.  Maybe she just could not bring herself to think of her father behaving in such an illicit manner.  The stress of this matter brought friction and estrangement in the relationship between mother and daughter.  And then Temme calls her daughter, Laura, to inform her that she believes she will take her up on her offer to live near her on the West coast for the final years of her life.

When Temme does move to the West coast, the reader witnesses Laura finding not just a place for her mother to live independently near her, but also to assist her mother in setting up her residence so that it closely resembles her previous home on the East coast.  It's like walking a tightrope for Laura trying to assist in her mother's care while also being married, juggling a career, and raising kids of her own.  As Temme continues to decline mentally and physically, we see mother and daughter at times make positive strides in their relationship while at other times, they both try one another's patience.  Laura does have a brother who assists periodically in their mother's care, but the two of them are not tight knit siblings.  

The one declaration Laura's mom makes clear as she continues to mentally deteriorate due to Alzheimer's is that when it is her time to go, she wants to go and not live as an invalid.  Fortunately, this request is made in a written legal document which enables retirement centers, hospitals, rehabilitation homes, and assisted living centers to know what Temme's wishes are for the end of her life (aka.. she does not want extraneous procedures or surgeries to prolong her life).    Throughout her mother's tenure living on her own near her daughter, having someone live with her, and finally, moving her mom to an assisted living center, I think mother and daughter come to appreciate one another's uniqueness and strengths.  I think it gives them time to build a stronger bond than they have ever had throughout life.  It's encouraging to see Temme realize and acknowledge that her daughter has gone above and beyond to take care of her and ensure her needs are met during the remaining years of her life.  And I think Laura once again reconnects with her brother thanks to both of them committing to helping their mom as she struggles near the end of her life.  

This is a book about family strife, estrangement, reconciliation, the trials and tribulations of watching an elderly parent decline in health, and a daughter's struggle to help her mom live with dignity while also having enough help to meet her basic daily needs.  It has always been enlightening to me to learn how different people cope with their parent's aging and dying.  And the single biggest task I hope to learn in a book such as this is how an adult child makes peace with a parent's death because for some of us, it is an ongoing struggle.  Sometimes peace and reconciliation with a parent may not come during their lifetime; sometimes the certainty of knowing you did your best to help your parent at their greatest time of need is where you will find peace.  I highly recommend this book.

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)

Review: The Vanishing Half: A Novel by Brit Bennett

 Dear Lit Loves,

This month I decided to challenge myself and read the 2020 Book of the Year entitled The Vanishing Half: A Novel by Brit Bennett.  Talk about an engrossing read!

First, there are two sisters, Desiree and Stella, who are both light-skinned African American females.  They grow up in the town of Mallard, LA where racism runs deep.  The two sisters witness the traumatic death of their father due to racism.  It leaves a dire impression of what it is like to be black and white in the deep South in the 1950s.  When the sisters are sixteen, they strike out together and head to New Orleans.  Together for a while, the girls share an apartment and a temporary work environment   Then, one sister gets a different job.  A job that in that day and time is really only awarded to white women.  Since this sister has light skin, she realizes she can pass in most environments as a white female.  This sister, Stella, enters into a relationship with a wealthy white man.  She goes on to live a privileged life.  

Meanwhile, the other sister, Desiree, is left to toil on her own and wonders what exactly happened to her sister, Stella, who seemingly disappears one day.  Later, Desiree moves to D.C. and marries a dark-skinned African American man with whom she shares a dark-skinned daughter.  When Desiree's marriage becomes abusive, she and her daughter, Jude, return to Mallard, LA to escape a reality of domestic violence.  They return to Mallard, LA where Desiree moves back into her childhood home, helps her mom, and tries to raise her daughter in a community that thinks of her daughter as "other" and most of the community ostracizes the young girl named Jude.

Both Desiree and Stella have daughters who eventually cross paths.  Desiree's daughter, Jude, puts the pieces of the puzzle together when she sees a woman who looks like her mom's sister Stella at a retirement party where she works as part of the catering crew.  Eventually, Jude realizes Stella's daughter, Kennedy, has no idea that her mother has a sister or that her mother is African American.  Jude tells Kennedy the truth.  Kennedy confronts her mother, Stella, about being black and having a family which she has led her family to believe is dead.  

Meanwhile, Jude enrolls at UCLA and develops a relationship with a transgender male named Reese.  He left home in order to live as his true self which is male.  Jude works to help him pay for the hormones and surgeries he desires so he can become physically male; however, Jude does not reveal any of this to anyone except Reese's friend, Barry who is already aware of the circumstances.  

The reader is confronted with perplexing questions of:  Is it okay to live a life of privilege if people accept you as white when you are only "passing" as white?  Is it okay to create a life of secrets and lies around your real race?  How does a person just up and leave the people who have known and loved them since birth?  Is it acceptable to lie about your race, gender, or family?  Also, what separates people who are one race, but live as a more privileged race and those individuals who reject their birth gender and leave their families to live as their more authentic, opposite gender?  

The questions mount as both sisters eventually encounter one another again later in life.  And the daughters of both sisters remain connected even as their mothers choose to live without actually being an active presence in one another's lives.  Is it ever worth it to completely lose connection with your original birth family?  Can someone just build an entirely new life and identity while leaving their blood relations behind to ponder their whereabouts?  And when is it necessary and healthy to potentially not have relations with members of one's birth family?

This is an incredibly well-written book.  It invites the reader to consider issues like racism, domestic violence, prejudice, harassment, the LBGTQ community, and also, who do we define as "family".  This is an insightful, riveting novel that will leave the reader wondering how he/she would handle the various scenarios of each character and their actions.  It is a must read!

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)

Review: Every Minute Is a Day: A Doctor, An Emergency Room, and a City Under Siege by Dr. Robert Meyer and Dan Koeppel

 Dear Readers,

Wow.  I wanted to read a memoir about someone who worked on the frontlines in the medical field during the Covid 19 pandemic.  I received my wish in the form of the book, Every Minute Is a Day by Dr. Robert Meyer and Dan Koeppel.  What did doctors think prior to the official announcement of a pandemic by the CDC?  Did doctors think Covid 19 was just a case of the flu?  How prepared were most hospitals for a pandemic?  How did people in the medical field cope with the overwhelmingly stressful environment of a hospital flooded with Covid patients in their ER, ICU, etc?

Because I spend so much time as a patient interacting with various medical specialists, I was intrigued at what would happen if you risked high exposure to Covid 19 while simply attempting to help others and do your job?  Dr. Meyer, who is an ER physician at Montefiore Medical Center in the Bronx, shares a diary he created during the pandemic and then sent to his cousin, Dan Koeppel (a journalist).  I think keeping a journal during the Covid 19 pandemic was part therapy and part documentation for Dr. Meyer.  Obviously, in January 2020 most people appeared to think Covid was centrally hitting China and could just cause flu-like symptoms.  March 2020 arrived and Montefiore Medical Center's ER started seeing cases continue to climb each week particularly in the emergency room.

Clearly, Dr. Meyer quickly observed patients were lining the halls of the ER.  The state of New York just stopped.  Businesses shut down.  Schools closed.  People were asked to work remotely.  The first Covid patients seen by Dr. Meyer appeared to have fevers and problems breathing.  Next, patients started exhibiting vomiting and diarrhea.  Interestingly, because oxygen levels in the body were lowered by Covid, people started exhibiting signs of cognitive confusion.  Then patients started exhibiting signs of inflammation which led to all sorts of more extreme complications.

There never seemed to be enough personal protective equipment at the hospital so one staff member began a crowdsourcing campaign for PPE and the designated delivery address became Dr. Meyer's home basement.  There were not enough ventilators for the number of patients needing them.  ER physicians and ER staff appeared to cope via working diligently together and the hospital offered online therapy as well.  Montefiore established a hospital diversion plan. whereby once it had all the patients it could handle, patients were then sent to other hospitals for treatment.  Eventually, a triage tent was erected outside the ER to evaluate patients before they ever entered the doors of the hospital.  Physicians were covered with protective gear so it was difficult interacting with patients.  Finally, the hospital's morgue could no longer contain an additional deceased patient so refrigerated trucks were parked outside the hospital specifically for housing the deceased.  

I can only imagine the trauma a person would endure witnessing everything Dr. Meyers did during the seven months of 2020 when he was writing to his cousin about what he was seeing and how he felt on a daily basis during the pandemic.  The ER medical director at Montefiore had both her parents test positive for Covid and lost her dad to the virus.  Dr. Meyer's mentor, Dr. John Gallagher, tested positive for Covid and wanted no one to visit his apartment for any reason because he was so ill.  He later would test positive for Covid, be admitted to the Montefiore ICU, and undergo rehab following the entire ordeal.  Physicians were having to apply for compassionate use of convalescent plasma and the antiviral drug, Remdesivir.  Heartbreakingly, many physician requests for these treatments were denied which required them to use their connections in order to gain access to these treatments.  

The most inspiring part of this book was Dr. Meyer's commitment to staying in the hospital and treating sick patients.  Not only were medical personnel exposing themselves to Covid, but in some cases also their loved ones.  Dr. Meyer remained committed to his Hippocratic Oath to protect patients from harm and injustice.  His hospital ER was in the Bronx which contained large numbers of elderly residing in nursing homes. Some of those elderly battled Covid in an assisted living center while many others were sent to Montefiore Medical Center.   Covid 19 disproportionately impacted African Americans and Hispanics to a great degree.  Heartbreakingly, many people died without a loved one by their side.  At times, I think most medical personnel during the pandemic questioned if they could remain in their profession and how long they could endure the relentless misery brought about by Covid 19.  

Dan Koeppel, Dr. Meyer's cousin who was receiving Dr. Meyer's daily journal entries, has his own medical scare during the course of the book.  Dr. Meyer assists his cousin in getting seen more quickly so a diagnosis and treatment plan could be enacted or else there very well could have been a more unfortunate outcome.  The one question that kept circling in my head at the end of the book was what do those patients who do not have a Dr. Meyer readily available as our cousin do when we're told to wait weeks for a scan or test that if done sooner might mean the difference between life and death?  This brought back my mantra:  the squeaky wheel gets the grease.  In other words, when it comes to your health or a loved one's health remember to ADVOCATE.  Let your voice be heard.  

And as Dan Koeppel cites toward the end of the book:  grow and learn from hardship.  Live in the moment.  And after reading this book I would add:  stay in the arena or keep pushing to help yourself and others when it comes to healthcare.  Whether it's educating yourself about a disease, keeping medical records, getting vaccinated, eating, exercising, asking questions, or seeking a better provider.  Do Not Give Up.

An excellent read that I highly recommend.

Best,

Grace (Amy)

Review: Dinner with Edward: A Story of an Unexpected Friendship by Isabel Vincent

 Dear Lit Loves,

Hi!  Recently, someone in the book club I attend selected Dinner with Edward:  A story of an Unexpected Friendship by Isabel Vincent as our August book selection.  Isabel Vincent is originally from Canada and is currently an investigative reporter for the New York Post.  Previously, she had been a foreign correspondent covering the war in Kosovo.  Once I read her author profile and learned she is an investigative journalist, I knew I should take a chance on reading this memoir.  (In another life, I am sure I was either a private investigator or investigative reporter because I am always curious about the people affected most by national tragedies or why various leaders and recently, our Supreme Court, decide to make decisions to invade a country or deny women the right to choose what to do with their bodies.)  (Hello, Clarence Thomas!  I am talking to you.  By the way, my nomination for a replacement for Justice Thomas would be professor Anita Hill.  Would that not be fabulous?!)  

So isabel Vincent and her husband move to Roosevelt Island where she takes a position as a reporter for The New York Post.  Roosevelt Island used to be home to a fairly famous mental asylum and she touches on the history of the place just enough to make the reader, like me, go research the area's history.  Unfortunately, Isabel finds herself in a truly rotten marriage and she has a daughter named Hannah.  Interestingly, Isabel strikes up a friendship with Edward, a ninety-three year old widower.  Edward was married for sixty-nine years to the love of his life, Paula.  When Edward's daughter asks Isabel to check in on her father since she lives near him, it becomes almost a weekly event of Edward cooking lavish dinners for the two of them.

Isabel and Edward are drawn to each other by a mutual need to find the courage to go on living after Isabel's mother dies and her marriage crumbles.  Edward has recently lost his beloved Paula.  Just when you think you have absolutely nothing in common with someone, the universe (God) intervenes and you are blessed with the presence of another soul who travels a similar journey as you.  Edward aspired to be an actor and playwright, but neither works out for he or Paula so he works part-time as both a welder and a tailor to help provide for the family.  Paula works as a jewelry painter in a local warehouse. 

During the tasty dinners Edward cooks for Isabel and an assortment of other friends, these two have meaningful conversations about the events in their lives.  Eventually, Edward communicates some valuable lessons to Isabel and these include:

1) Set an example of strength and independence for her daughter, Hannah.

2) Set aside time to take care of yourself and how you present yourself to the world.

3) Fight for what is yours and never allow someone to own you and your life.

4) Communicate well.  This should involve actual face to face conversations.  Email and texts are relieved on so heavily that people have forgotten how to actually sustain meaningful conversations in-person.

5) Do whatever possible to enhance your sense of self-worth.

6) Do what makes you feel most alive and useful each day.

7) Establish and maintain relationships.  Treat family like guests and guests like family.

8) Life is not stationary.  Do not languish in fear or doubt.  Seize the day.

Isabel eventually moves away from Roosevelt Island to Manhattan where she leases an apartment.  She starts making meals similar to Edward's, but with her own twist on the recipe.  She develops friends and eventually someone with whom she develops a romantic relationship.  Though at the end of the book Edward rallies from several health scares, we know that he has made an impact on Isabel and she has influenced his life.  They are better people for having known one another.  

This is a delightful book that has chapters beginning with dinner menus which is a creative way to tell a story.  The only part of the book that bothered me was when Paula is ill and a doctor tells Edward not to take Paula to hospice because they will just give her morphine until she passes.  Maybe that is true in New York City or on Roosevelt Island, but I have witnessed people truly benefit from hospice care.  Others I have witnessed desire hospice care in their final months and weeks only to die sometimes painfully at home all alone.  But the author was being true to the events that occurred as they were relayed to her so that portion of the book is not her fault. (I just had a strong reaction to that part of the book because of my personal experiences.)

Overall, a delightful book that invites readers to watch as two people who are generations apart help each other to move on with their lives and learn the value of friendship particularly when we are faced with difficult times in life.  A must read.

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)

Review: No One Ever Asked by Katie Ganshert

 Dear Lit Loves,

Greetings!  I survived an Iridotomy!  Yes, it's true.  This medical anomaly just keeps getting handed unusual diagnoses.  I learned in May 2022 that I have developed narrow-angle closure glaucoma in my left eye (the one that had been normal up till then).  I already have Uveitic glaucoma in my right eye.  My glaucoma surgeon broke the new diagnosis to me and it was like a sucker-punch to the gut and a left hook to the face.  Narrow angle closure glaucoma can quickly lead to closed angle glaucoma so I had to put a rush on undergoing treatment for it.  It is essentially when the pupil and iris of the eye begin tilting forward and sealing off the ocular fluid drain (trabecular meshwork).  Most people do not know they have it until the eye drain is completely blocked. An Iridotomy involved shrinking my pupil, having the eye numbed, and my glaucoma surgeon using two lasers on the left eye - one to prevent bleeding and the other to create a drain via my iris for ocular fluid in the left eye.  It was a scary experience, but I did not suffer optical nerve damage thankfully.

Meanwhile, I made my way through reading No One Ever Asked by Katie Ganshert.  I had never read any book by this author, but the premise intrigued me.  The story revolved around the crises of three women and two school districts.  One school district is in an impoverished area and has lost its accreditation.  The other school district is an elite school operating with students from middle to high socioeconomic backgrounds.  When South Fork School System loses accreditation, the district must pay for any of its students to attend the Crystal Ridge School System's high-performing schools.  And this creates tensions between parents and students from both districts.

There are three women whose lives are affected by the local area school crisis.  Camille, a woman from a high socioeconomic background who is well-known for leading the PTA at Crystal Ridge Schools and leading local fundraising activities, but her marriage is falling apart and she is having a chaotic time trying to parent three kids.  She seems to have the perfect life, but not when the reader learns what is really happening in her life.  Next is Jen, a woman who is an experienced nurse who moves to the area after her husband and she adopt a black child who has experienced a great deal of trauma prior to her adoption. Jen is attempting to be a school nurse at a Crystal Ridge high school and be a mom to a child who may have outbursts if an event triggers traumas from her past.  Finally, there is Anaya, a young black educator who teaches second grade at an elementary school in Crystal Ridge.  She longs to teach at South Fork School District where her father was a leader up until his recent death.

The plot centers around a host of issues including racial equality in schools, discrimination, adoption, sexual harassment, and family trauma.  Will Camille learn to recognize the discriminatory behavior in herself and her closest friends?  Will her marriage survive a separation that comes about due to her over-involvement in just about everything?  Will Jen learn to be a mother to her newly adopted daughter?  How will she navigate parenting a child who has regular outbursts due to the trauma the child endured at an orphanage? How will Jen and her husband cope when their daughter is disparaged by some classmates simply due to the color of her skin?  Will Anaya be able to teach a group of second graders in a school district where parents and students exhibit racist attitudes and behaviors?  Will she be able to find peace with the death of her father and the traumatic incident that happened to her during her year of student teaching?  

This is a whirlwind of a book, but it will make you think and reflect on what you would do if you found youself in any of the highly charged situations the three main characters face.  Interestingly, the ending of the book is loaded with some bombshell revelations. Finally, I felt the ending of the book was too tidy for three female lead characters who were grappling with such complicated realities.  And as a reader, I still had questions regarding each character that were never answered.  I respect the author for tackling such complicated issues in a work of fiction that very well reflects the realities women and our communities are grappling with today 

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)

Review: Somebody's Daughter: A Memoir by Ashley C. Ford

 Dear Lit Loves,

Most recently I read Somebody's Daughter:  A Memoir by Ashley C. Ford and it was a story so well-voiced, it took me about a week to process all that happened to this young black female.  Have you ever read what you know to be a true story and afterward wanted to reach through the book and hug the person who not only survived in the book, but also took the opportunity to write their truth?  That is where I found myself with this particular book.  Profoundly stunning.  And it takes a book of deafening significance to shake me to my soul, particularly when it comes to the memoir genre.

The core of the book revolves around Ashley, a four-year-old black girl living with her mom in Indiana.  Her dad has been sent to prison and she only knows of him through his sporadic letters to her.  The reader witnesses how Ashley and her mom and brother live without him.  Most of her family lives within four miles of each other.  Ashley grows up in a household with quite a bit of drama.  Her mom works several jobs, has various boyfriends, and attempts to do right by her children but often causes Ashley to live in fear of her mother.  She wonders if she can ever do or be right in the eyes of her mom.  Puberty brings a feeling of isolation for Ashley and a whole mountain of uncertainty about who she is and where she belongs.  Ashley's grandmother is the one pillar of strength and stability in Ashley's life.  I think the one person who Ashley knew loved her was her grandmother.  She lived with her grandmother for a portion of her life and they have an unshakeable bond.  The remainder of the story revolves around what happens when Ashley learns of the crime her dad committed, what she will do with her life beyond high school, her tension-filled relationship with her mom, and confronting reality when her grandmother is hospitalized and her father is released from prison.  

The most riveting moments in this book for me are when Ashley decides to go visit her father in prison and when she is called to return home to Indiana by her mom due to her grandmother's illness.  I have always believed throughout life that our life experiences give shape to our character.  Whether it is noticing you are one of the only people in your class that has no computer or wondering if you are ever going to be loved and understood by your mom, we are all marked in life by our highs and our lows.  Whatever you have experienced in life whether it be a health crisis, a relative being imprisoned, life as a single mom, losing someone you love, or just trying to put one foot in front of the other when you are staggering due to the weight of life itself, we are all changed in some way by our experiences.  Experiences matter whether they be peaks or valleys, including the way we are treated, how we treat others, who we love and who loves us as well as those people who were the light in the midst of a hurricane that may have engulfed us.  These all combine to make us the individuals we are from birth till death.  Ashley Ford's book is her truth, her experiences, and what we can and should learn from both as she relates them to the reader in such a realistic, brilliant manner.

If there were one central message that I could say I walked away with after reading this moving memoir, it is the importance of remembering we often do not know what realities other people are facing so tread carefully when interacting with others.  Be mindful of how your words and actions could impact others.  And never forget when rearing a child, teaching a child, or just being a relative to a child to always communicate what the nanny in the book, The Help, communicated to the little ones she cared for and that is:  You are good. You are loved.  You are important.  

This book is incredibly thought-provoking and without a doubt well-written.  Thank you, Ms. Ford for pulling back the curtain on your life, your survival, and your truths.  May we finish your book and find ourselves with a little more hope for our world and the people in it.  

A highly recommended book and one I give a five star rating.

Best,

Grace (Amy)

P.S.  I will be away over the next couple of weeks due to the need to have surgery to help heal a new glaucoma discovered in my left eye.  I shall and intend to return.  And I am always with my readers in spirit.  Truly, Grace (Amy)

 

Review: Dear Life: A doctor's story of love, loss and consolation by Rachel Clarke

 Dear Lit Loves,

In the latter portion of the month of May, I opted to read a memoir written by Rachel Clarke, a palliative care physician in England.  The book's title is Dear Life:  A doctor's story of love, loss and consolation. Dr. Clarke was educated at Oxford and originally studied documentary journalism specializing in current events.  In her late twenties, she decided to return to college to retrain as a doctor, particularly one specializing in how to care for individuals staring down the end of their life journey.  I was especially drawn to this book as the author discusses how she coped with the loss of her father who was also a physician.  

Initially, Rachel Clarke begins her training in medicine by studying cadavers.  I think this is the portion of medical school that readily causes many students to drop the whole notion of going into medicine or at least that is what I have heard among many people over the years who began their career study in the field of medicine and then abruptly ended that endeavor when faced with dissecting a cadaver.  Ms. Clarke is most definitely up for the task.  The professor overseeing her group of medical students ensures that people who donated their bodies to science are treated with reverence and dignity.  Upon working in a hospital for the first time, the reader sees Ms. Clarke observe a patient requiring resuscitation even though the patient has suffered through a grueling illness and enjoyed a rather long life.  The whole process appears cruel to Ms. Clarke as this patient does not have an official Advance Directive, a document outlining whether you wish to be resuscitated in the event of a cardiac arrest, stroke, etc.  Interestingly, most of the population does not have an advance directive.  Without this important document, should you suddenly find yourself in cardiac arrest, medical staff will take all measures to attempt to resuscitate you.  And resuscitation can be loud, chaotic, traumatic, and bone-crushing, etc.  Oftentimes, resuscitation does not offer the most peaceful way to die, but it often happens because most individuals do not wish to think about much less directly document how they wish to transition from life to death.

For Ms. Clarke, it became readily apparent to her that end of life care was of special importance when she began to notice individuals dying in hospitals where the noise levels are astounding, pain management may not be important to the attending physician, and families of the deceased are often exhausted, unnerved, and traumatized by their loved one's death.  Bluntly, it can be horrific to witness a loved one's death not being handled with dignity and reverence inside the corridors of a hospital.  

When Dr. Clarke observes palliative or end of life care, she sees that people transition from undergoing more relentless treatment options for life extension to just focusing on enjoying the remaining time they have left in their life journey.  In palliative care there should be a focus on a patient coming to terms with mortality, acceptance of the reality of death, and deciding to live their final days with a sense of peace, comfort, and more compassionate care.  Death takes on a whole new quality when Dr. Clarke learns that her father has cancer.  Her father spends the last year of his life opting for several forms of cancer treatment, but finally accepts that the variety of treatments are not working and opting to cease treating his cancer and live his final weeks with as little distress as possible.  The author and her mom along with a palliative care team assist Dr. Clarke's father in a transition to death with as much reverence, joy, comfort, and compassion as is humanly possible.  The reader sees that how a person exits life is just as significant and impactful as how and when that same individual entered life.   This was quite a thought-provoking and insightful book.   Any patient would be lucky to have Dr. Clarke overseeing their final days of life in a palliative care environment.

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)  

Review: Dear Edward by Ann Napolitano

 Dear Lit Loves,

Greetings!  For the last half of April 2022, I have been reading a book selection from the list generated by the book club I attend regularly in Cary, N.C.  It is a book that the club will discuss later in the summer, but I thought it sounded intriguing so I decided to jump ahead and read it.  The title of the book is Dear Edward and its author is Ann Napolitano.  I had never read any books by this author, but she received her MFA from New York University and teaches writing at Brooklyn College's MFA program, NYU's Continuing and Professional Studies, and Gotham Writers Workshop.

The premise of the story is that a middle school age son named Eddie boards a flight with his family intended for a destination of Los Angeles as his mother has taken a position as a screenwriter on a television show and this leads to a family decision to relocate to California.  Eddie sits with his older brother, Jordan, and his dad, Bruce, in economy class while mom takes a seat in first class so she can continue to write dialogue for the television show.  Throughout the flight the reader is introduced to a variety of passengers on the plane - a flight attendant, a soldier, a woman fleeing her marriage, etc.  And then suddenly the plane crashes in a field in Colorado and Eddie is the sole survivor.  While recovering in a hospital, Eddie's maternal aunt and her husband are called and decide to essentially raise Eddie.  They refer to him as Edward.  Edward returns home with the aunt and uncle and must learn how to move forward with his life without his mom, dad, and brother.  The remainder of the book explores how Edward is slowly able to process the tragedy, pick up the pieces of his life, and also how he handles being at the center of the country's fascination that he was the only one on board the plane who survived.

There were a variety of issues addressed in the book and one of utmost importance is that Edward essentially has to rebuild his life and his identity after losing his entire family.  Obviously, cognitive behavioral therapy helps, but so does befriending a girl his age who lives next door to his aunt and uncle.  Edward had previously been home-schooled by his dad and now he must attend a public middle and high school which is completely foreign to him.  Thankfully, his new friend Shay attends the same school and helps him adjust.  Additionally, the principal takes an interest in Edward and gives him the responsibility of helping to keep the ferns in his office alive by regularly coming by the office to water the plants.  Eddie's aunt and uncle were never able to have kids, but had been trying.  There only available bedroom is one that has been outfitted as a nursery which Edward for the most part rejects.  Later, he is given his own bedroom in the basement of the house.  

Interestingly, no matter who we lose in life whether it is a mom, dad, or sibling, most of us have to inevitably face what to do with our deceased relatives' belongings.  In this case, a lot of the boxes of clothes are shipped to Edward's aunt and uncle's home where they reside in the room outfitted as a nursery.  Edward notices his aunt begin wearing one of his mother's blouses which the aunt hopes will possibly help instill in her some of her sister's bravery.  Next, Edward begins wearing his brother's bright orange parka.  Everyone deals with grief differently, but I know when my own father died, I claimed three Atlanta Braves' caps that he wore everywhere along with his watch.  There was something about those items that to this day continue to help me feel that my dad is still with me and this brings me some peace.

When Edward discovers that the family members of people who died on the flight have been writing to him asking him to do various tasks in memory of their loved one, he and his friend Shay begin keeping track of all the requests and both try to complete as many as they deem important and possible.  To me, this is where the reader sees other people coping with grief through writing and trying to stay in touch with the last person who might have seen or spoken to their loved one.  It made me grateful that I was with my father when he passed away because in many respects it gives me peace to know he was not by himself when he died.  

Finally, I think there was the theme of just the sheer randomness of life events and the idea that we often live as if we are guaranteed to be here tomorrow when really no one knows where they will be or what will have happened to them five minutes, five hours, or five years from now.  Thus, many of the people who write to Edward urge him to not waste time and seize the day.  The best part of the book for me was the ending.  I will not give it away, but it left me feeling like Edward had come full circle after the crash and was on his way to bigger and better things.

An absolute joy of a book to read.  I highly recommend you read it for yourself and think about how you would handle this same situation.  See for yourself what themes prick your interest.  A job well-done Ms. Napolitano!

Best,

Grace (Amy)

Review: The Invisible Kingdom: Reimagining Chronic Illness by Meghan O'Rourke

 Dear Lit Loves,

Returning to my favorite genre this month, I read the memoir titled The Invisible Kingdom:  Reimagining Chronic Illness by Meghan O'Rourke.  I selected this book because like Ms. O'Rourke, I have experienced my life be turned upside down and inside out with chronic illness and autoimmune disease.  And as a fellow writer, I wanted to see how she tackled a memoir on chronic illness compared with how I have tried to write about my own struggles with chronic illness.  

Ms. O'Rourke takes a research, personal narrative, and empathetic approach to discussing her experiences with chronic illness.  Initially, like most of us with long-term chronic illness, she had no idea what the multitude of symptoms she was experiencing could be caused by.  Next, again like most of us living in the world of chronic illness, the author seeks answers from a multitude of physicians and medical specialists.  It did not surprise me that many physicians just "blew off" what was ailing her.  Heaven help us all if a doctor is unable to diagnose what ailment you have and additionally admit he/she does not know a way to treat your ailment.  Obviously, if that is the case, many doctors will just chalk it up to a patient being a hypochondriac or blame what symptoms you have on anxiety.  This is exactly what happened with my own experiences with multiple chronic illnesses since age eighteen and it did not surprise me that Ms. O'Rourke encountered the very same indifference in our health care system and with the many physicians who make up that medical system.  

The most difficult part sometimes is getting even one physician to listen to and hear you as a patient with an autoimmune disorder or chronic illness because most of them only have ten to fifteen minutes to spend with you in an office or patient room.  And then there is the idea that if you do not "look sick" then you appear just fine to the rest of the world.  Hence, those of us with chronic illness live in "The Invisible Kingdom".  Ms. O'Rourke does a superb job communicating her story of initially having a thyroid issue that leads to a possible Lyme disease diagnosis, and also Ehrler-Danlos Syndrome (connective tissue disorder involving skin and joints).  She tries integrative medicine to a much greater extent than I ever have or would.  I was a bit skeptical when she submitted to the "ozone and ultraviolet light therapy".  Chronic Lyme Disease markers in lab tests finally leads her to antibiotic therapy which begins the first success in her symptoms receding. 

Ms. O'Rourke did an excellent job of researching autoimmune disorders and chronic disease inclusive of her own in this book.  I learned more about Lyme disease in this book than I have from anyone I know who currently has chronic Lyme disease.  I appreciated her focus too on the importance of the microbiome and the health of the digestive tract.  I think having a healthy balance of good and bad bacteria in the gut is crucial to patients with chronic disease as well as autoimmune disease.  I'm not sure I would have been willing to go so far as to try one unusual technique she attempted to balance the bacteria in her gut, but I give her points for the courage to submit to the procedure.  And I greatly appreciated that she demonstrated how even she succumbed to a treatment that was definitely outlandish - a person can become so desperate for relief that they are willing to try almost anything.

The most moving part of the book for me was after all she went through to discover answers and find possible remedies to her symptoms, she looked back with grief on almost a decade of her life that she lost because she was dealing with chronic illness and how it can wreak havoc with your life.  For me, I have lost more than a decade as my journey with multiple chronic illnesses and an underlying autoimmune disorder began in my teens.  Additionally, there is such a need in our health care system for specific centers where specialists are located that deal exclusively with autoimmune disease and chronic illness along with medical specialists communicating with one another about a patient's symptoms, tests, treatment plan, and continuing care.  Most chronically ill patients are left to make sure each of our medical specialists are obtaining the information from our labs, testing, and treatments on our own.  The neurologist does not just reach out to communicate and collaborate with the rheumatologist.  And for a patient who is already carrying the load of chronic disease, it is like pushing a tractor-trailer up a hill to additionally keep all our specialists appraised on the dynamics and specifics of our case.  

And if there is one silver lining with respect to the Covid 19 pandemic, it is that a good portion of people are experiencing symptoms long-term even after the Covid infection has passed.  The medical community is going to be forced to start dealing in a more effective and collaborative fashion with a greater number of patients that have long-Covid and long-Covid is decisively also chronic illness which hopefully means our medical system will take a greater interest in doing a better job of funding, researching, and treating all patients with chronic illness.   As my dad has always said, "The squeaky wheel gets the grease" and with our world now facing possibly a greater number of people having long-Covid 19, maybe chronic disease will rise in priority now so that patients receive the validation and quality ongoing medical care they deserve and that should have been more effectively managed medically long before Covid 19 appeared on the horizon.

A well-written and soundly researched memoir!  Congrats Ms. O'Rourke!  I highly recommend this book.

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)

Review: The Lincoln Highway: A Novel by Amor Towles

 Dear Lit Loves,

Greetings!  And well, thankfully I am returning to my book club meetings this week.  Interestingly, the last two book selections were just not my favorite genres.  Why do I read the books then?  I keep hoping that maybe the author or content of the book is going to surprise me and be better than I expected.  Thus far, all I can really say is:  ain't happenin' for me.  Perhaps I am becoming too picky in my literature choices or maybe I'm just old enough to know what I like to read and know when a book comes along that I would say to someone, "You should really read this."

So back to my book club selections.  And mind you, this is not a selection I made, but rather, a selection another individual in the book club has made that we have all agreed to read for a given month.  The latest book is The Lincoln Highway:  A Novel by Amor Towles.  Honestly, I had no familiarity with the author.  I know his previous books were bestsellers and that he attended Yale University and earned his Master's degree in Literature from Stanford.  The book itself is close to 600 pages which always makes me skeptical because when a book is written with this many pages, I generally read it and think, "If the author had cut 300 pages, he/she could have still achieved the same result."   

With The Lincoln Highway, you have a narrative that surrounds one teenager who gets sent to a work farm and he is returning home after his father dies leaving the family house and acreage to he and his younger brother.  The oldest brother, Emmett, decides that he and his brother Billy should sell the house and land and go forth to create a future for themselves.  Their mother abandoned the family years before and it's not really made clear why.  Emmett returns home to discover his brother Billy has located all these postcards that their mother sent them once she left the family.  Postcards depicting her travels along The Lincoln Highway on her way to California.  Postcards that their father kept from them.  Emmett eventually warms to Billy's travel suggestion and the reader thinks they will be off to California to locate their mom.  No.  While Emmett is closing on the sale of the homeplace and getting his car ready for the trip, two boys who served time on the juvenile work farm with him suddenly appear announcing they actually returned to Nebraska with Emmett by hiding in the trunk of the warden's vehicle.   The warden drove Emmett back home to Nebraska.   Suddenly readers discover these two boys had not finished serving their penance and have now left the work farm with the intention of never returning to it.  

Next, the oldest stowaway, Duchess, convinces Emmett to take he and his friend, Woolly, to New York so Woolly can visit his grandfather's home in the Adirondacks and claim his $150,000 heritage which they will all eventually split.  Alas, there really is no traveling extensively on the Lincoln Highway.  There is a road trip to New York which turns into a wild goose chase.  And I have to say, I have no idea why the author chose to take that turn of events with this book.  There are so many shenanigans, disruptions, side characters, unexpected turn of events, and a multitude of sadness that is portrayed as "funny" when it is anything but funny.   The reader does eventually learn why three of the four boys were sentenced to the work farm, but for only two of the four musketeers do we ever learn what fate awaits them.  Needless to say, there were a few too many storylines that just were never brought to fruition and I was left wondering what happened to multiple side characters.  There is also a lot of redundancy in the book particularly in terms of when the characters were speaking to one another.  

The most interesting part to me involved how in the world the author was going to end this grand escapade that I thought was going to center around The Lincoln Highway, but instead takes a seriously awkward turn toward the misadventures of four boys making their way to New York and what happens once they arrive.  After reading close to six hundred pages, I was ready for illustrations of lessons learned and some self-evident themes, but those were just not present in this book for me.  There were parts of the book that were so depressing I really did not wish to read further, but in order to write this review and discuss the book with members of my book club, I trudged on making myself continue to read the book when I just wanted to move on to my next book in the queue.  

Frankly, I just cannot write a winning review of The Lincoln Highway.  This is usually not the case for me even when I am reading a book completely outside of my favorite genres, but it is the unvarnished truth.  I refuse to write a winning review of a book that I honestly would not readily recommend to my own friends, acquaintances, or readers of this blog.  I would not recommend this book and I am curious as to why it was selected as a potential read in the book club I attend.  

Here's hoping my next book goes above and beyond my expectations.

Best,

Grace (Amy)

Review: Notes On An Execution: A Novel by Danya Kukafka

 Dear Lit Loves,

Greetings!  Happy St. Patrick's Day!  For the last week I made a clear departure from reading memoirs to reading a book that would most likely be classified as mystery/thriller.  The book's title, Notes On An Execution:  A Novel, by Danya Kukafka initially grabbed my attention.  When I read the book's summary that is when I thought, maybe I should just see if or how this book about a serial killer is or is not different from similar books I have read.  So the book is told not totally focused on the serial killer, rather we learn his story through the eyes of three distinct women he encountered throughout the course of his life.  And the book's timeline is depicted over the hours leading up to the serial killer's execution.  Highly Intriguing.

First, the author introduces you to Lavender who is the mother of the serial killer, Ansel.  We see Lavender as a teenage mother ill-equipped to handle a marriage much less motherhood.  She is living locked away in a farmhouse where she and her abusive husband reside.  Her husband is downright despicable as he locks cabinets and the refrigerator full of food when he is not at the house.  He may leave Lavender one can of beans to survive on as she tries to raise four year old Ansel and his four month old brother.  Eventually, Lavender convinces her husband to take her for a drive deliberately leaving the kids at the farmhouse.  While stopped at a convenience store, she locks herself in a supply closet and calls the police to tell them the 2 kids need to be rescued from the farmhouse.  She then boards a bus hoping to land anywhere but the hellish circumstances from which she has escaped.

Next we meet Saffron also known as Saffy who is a child sharing a foster home with Ansel.  She is suspicious of Ansel from the beginning as she discovers Ansel has left her a gift on the top of her twin bed.  It's so disgusting that she removes the sheets from her bed along with the gift and quickly deposits all of it in the trash.  Saffy will later grow up to become a police chief and the homicide investigator who ultimately captures and helps convict Ansel for the deaths of four women.

Hazel happens to be the twin sister of Jenny, the college gal that Ansel married.  Hazel and Jenny look almost identical and although Hazel grew up quite jealous of Jenny and her extrovert nature, she later realizes that her sister has married a man (Ansel) who makes her sister's life quite miserable enough that eventually, Jenny calls Hazel to help her escape her life with Ansel.  

Also along this journey, we meet Blue Harrison who is the daughter of Ansel's brother, Ellis, who was adopted quickly after the two boys were discovered by the police in the farmhouse.  Blue's father dies of cancer and she and her mom are left to manage the restaurant her father and mother started.  Eventually, Blue and her mother will meet Ansel.  Eventually though crime always leaves a footprint and Saffron will warn Blue and her mother to stay away from Ansel as she is quickly unfurling evidence that Ansel has killed three girls already.

The book analyzes how one criminal act has a ripple effect on the lives of many people and not just the person who has been murdered.  More people are victims of one criminal act other than just the person who paid the ultimate price with his/her life.  It is almost like watching a series of dominoes fall as you begin to see how many people in particular, women, have their lives upended because of one serial killer.  This novel will make you question if a person is all bad, all good, or a speck of gray matter combining both good and evil.  Also, I thought about whether people who commit heinous acts ever regret what they have done?  Can they ever really make amends to all the people whose lives have been adversely and ominously impacted by a criminal act?  And is the ultimate apology that the criminal and in this case serial killer, must pay the price by being put to death?  Will that bring a victim's family peace?  And also, when a beloved family member dies at the hands of a serial killer, is that person still alive through their spirit?  And finally the ultimate question:  if a serial killer repents at the end of his life, does God or a greater power forgive him?  

Needless to say, this was a deeply emotional book.  It is written quite poetically which helps give the reader an insight into the three women whose lives have been impacted negatively by Ansel making the choice to become a serial killer.  This book does not glorify the serial killer.  This book makes you witness the destruction the serial killer has on the lives of so many others and not just the people that he killed.  This book motivated me to keep turning the pages.  I wanted to know what happened next and what would be the next "big issue" the book would make me ponder.   A book that is a difficult but necessary read.

Best,

Grace (Amy)

Review: Klara And The Sun: A Novel by Kazuo Ishiguro

 Dear Lit Loves,

Greetings!  Happy Spring!  Happy post Covid!  Hallelujah, I can get back to attending my book club meetings in April.  During the first of March, I decided to begin reading my book club's assigned discussion novel titled Klara And The Sun:  A Novel by Kazuo Ishiguro.  If you know me well, this is a book way beyond my tastes in terms of literature.  This is a novel set in the future and told by a robot who is sitting on a showroom floor waiting for someone to buy her so that she can become their "Artificial Friend".   Riiiggghhhttt.  My first thought was, "You've got to be kidding."   

The author, Kazuo Ishiguro, has won the Nobel Prize in Literature and the Booker Prize so even though the book sounded completely too sci-fi for me, I decided to give it a thorough read.  The book examines how artificial intelligence is used to replicate the human form in mind, body, and spirit.  The robot, Klara, finally meets her "person" in the form of Josie, a fairly young girl who lives with her mom mostly by themselves.  Josie's mom, Mrs. Arthur, has already lost a daughter and evaluates how well robot Klara interacts with her daughter and also how well Klara can mimic her daughter.  Josie's best friend and neighbor, Rick lives next door with his mom who is mostly socially isolated.  Josie's mom wishes for her daughter to be "lifted" into the upper ranks of society so she insists her daughter attend classes via her tablet and attend "Interactive" meetings with other people her age who have parents wishing for them to be "lifted."    The author never really states what it means to be "lifted", but from my reading of the book, I interpreted it to mean people who are intellectually advanced technologically but are seriously lacking in emotional and social intelligence.  Robot Klara appears to have a better ability to read people and their emotions and behaviors than any of the other characters.

When robot Klara learns Josie has some form of chronic illness, she tries to harness the sun's energy to heal Josie because she observed the sun heal a beggar and his dog from her spot on a store's showroom floor.  The problem comes when Klara realizes that Josie's mom actually bought Klara in case she needed a replacement daughter for Josie.  Josie's friend Rick is a loner and essentially self-educated.  He does his own drone research and actually builds model bird drones.  He is not inclined toward being "lifted" until later in the book.  And the book invites you to speculate if he eventually chooses to go to college because his mom asked a favor of someone on the university board or if he decided to attend college of his own free will.  

Robot Klara asks the sun to heal Josie and intuits that the sun does not like all the pollution in this futuristic world.  Klara is inclined to go break a machine that she knows is causing pollution in order to please the sun so that the sun will heal Josie.  Josie's dad assists Klara in this task, but Klara realizes there is more than one machine polluting this future world and she has only been able to break one of the pollution producing machines by sacrificing a part of herself in the process.  

In the end, Josie is healed, robot Klara first winds up in a storage closet, and Rick attends college and he and Josie go their separate ways.  Sadly, Klara eventually finds herself sitting in a junk yard because she has served her original purpose.  And because robot Klara sacrificed a critical part of herself to help heal Josie, she loses much of her abilities.  Klara then becomes a part of the pollution.  The other robot in the store who was staged near Klara has also been discarded in the junk yard.  The book asks you if artificial intelligence is truly worth it?  Can it do what a human can do and do it better?  Will artificial intelligence eventually just be replaced with another tech advancement that leads to more tech devices contributing to world pollution?  Can technology truly replace a human being?  (Personally, this Generation Xer thinks not, but if you ask an individual from Generation Z, you might get an entirely different answer).  

This was a fascinating read so I am glad I took a chance on reading the book.  It does make you think about the future, how much influence technology will play in years to come, if humans can be replaced by artificial intelligence, and how much are we willing to sacrifice for the ones we love?  I think the book also invites the question of in the future will people who are not "lifted" or intellectually gifted be excluded from society?  It is kind of like someone who does not use the internet today.  Are they really missing out on an essential part of life or were we as a society better off without the internet due to its often gross misuse?  Can you really live without the internet and a cell phone?

This is a book that asks you to consider how much technology plays a role in your life and how much good does technology bring to society?  Has technology made us better human beings?  Personally, I don't think the world can ever replace a human being nor do I think it would be wise to do so.  What do you think?

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)

Book Review: Crying in H Mart: A Memoir by Michelle Zauner

 Dear Lit Loves,

I took a break from my book club assigned reading this month because I had already read the book selection.  If that leads me anywhere it will usually be to selecting a book from the memoir genre.  Sure enough, I found Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner and decided to take a chance on it.  I did not know anything about the author except that I think her memoir won the GoodReads Choice Award for best memoir of 2021.  I later learned the author is in a band and has written for several major media publications.  

This memoir is written from the standpoint of a young girl growing up in Eugene, Oregon having a Korean mother and an American father.  Her mother was quite strict with her while she was growing up and her father worked as a used car salesman.  Her mother embraces her Korean heritage through food and lots of it.  That is how she expresses her love for Michelle is through making authentic Korean dishes for her and also, the family goes biannually to visit her mother's family in Seoul.

When Ms. Zauner's mother is diagnosed with cancer, she learns from her father that her mom will begin undergoing treatment in an attempt to slow the cancer.  Her mom has made it clear that after watching her sister die of cancer, she will only give cancer treatment about two rounds and if it has not proven successful in shrinking her cancerous tumors, she wants no further treatment.  When Ms. Zauner is called home by her father who tells her he needs help caring for her mother, we see the visceral shock a daughter experiences upon witnessing a parent in rapidly declining health.  While Ms. Zauner's dad retreats into his own world during this time period, it is Michelle who realizes her mother is becoming sluggish, dehydrated, and emaciated from lack of calorie intake.  Following a local hospitalization, Ms. Zauner's mother is able to come home for a brief time as other female friends arrive to stay with Michelle and her dad to help care for her mother.  

It was heart-breaking at times to read about the final days and moments Michelle shared with her mother as she realizes her mother is quickly nearing the end of her life.  Michelle moves heaven and earth to make her mother happy prior to her passing.  Her mother dies at home in her own surroundings.  The reader then watches as Ms. Zauner stays with her father and tries to clean out her mother's belongings from her childhood home.  And ten months later, Michelle tries to move forward with her life by following her artistic aspirations and continuing to try and embrace the Korean heritage she inherited from her mom.

It's always interesting to witness what we inherit from our parents and how each influenced our lives from what they said or did to their own interests and our later insights into how they raised us as individuals.  A good portion of the book is about the author forging her own identity, but it is also about coming to appreciate a parent's way of displaying love and how he/she has shaped our lives and identity.  The book is also a bird's eye look into what is often the excruciating experience of an adult child losing a parent to an aggressive cancer.  Did we say what we wanted them to know before they left us?  What memories of them shine most brilliantly in our recollections of them?  And this book is also about carrying on the best parts of our parents in ourselves as we try to move on with our lives following their deaths.  How will our parents live on through us as we try and find our way forward in life without them?

This is a moving book.  Having lost a father to a rare cancer, I had to put the book down at times as I remembered my own experiences with my dad in his final days and asked myself what characteristics of his live on through me?  What a moving tribute to her mom this book is.  What a powerful and insightful read.  I highly recommend this book.

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)

Review: Anxious People: A Novel by Fredrik Backman

 Dear Lit Fanatics,

Wow!  I just finished reading the powerful, realistic fiction book titled Anxious People:  A Novel by Swedish author Fredrik Backman.  I think Mr. Backman must have been a psychology/psychiatry major in college because he always speaks to some aspect of humanity in all of his books.  In Anxious People, the book starts in an unusual manner.  The reader gets little vignettes of the lives of various people who eventually, in the course of day, are all going to find themselves in a highly charged situation.  They are going to come together and share their grievances, secrets, passions, and longings and find connection.  More than that, they are going to have to consider the human condition of desperation and the drastic measures it can prompt a person to take even if the actions cause no one harm.  Over time this group of people will be forced to make a group decision of whether a person they don't know deserves a second chance at redemption.

Initially, the reader is informed that a woman who was having difficulties in her marriage left her husband, but she still wanted to obtain partial custody of her two girls.  Her husband's divorce attorney threatens to take her girls away from her if she cannot provide a stable, safe home.  The problem is that this mother cannot earn enough money to pay rent on a residence where both she and her daughters can live.  She gets to a point where she sees no other recourse but to grab a gun, which she thinks is fake but is actually a real pistol, and she goes to rob a bank asking for the exact amount of rent she needs, no more and no less.  Interestingly, she does not realize the bank she attempts to rob is a cashless bank so her mission is not achieved.  Before the police arrive, the mom runs across the street to a block of apartments and runs inside the first residential door that is open only to find that the apartment is for sale and people are there viewing the apartment in order to potentially buy it.  This bank robber/mom is now holding the apartment viewers as hostages.

This is the point in the book where eight people inside the apartment suddenly get to know one another given the circumstances in which they find themselves.  At the same time a father and son who are both police officers in this small town are attempting to respond to the hostage crisis once the bank robber makes a demand for pizza and fireworks.  The father and son "tolerate" one another and have remained living in the same residence after their wife/mom dies and their daughter/sister has been lost to the ravages of drug addiction.  Additionally, one of the hostages is a banker who does not like her job even though she can do it quite well.  She is also struggling with suicidal thoughts and has carried an envelope from a man who jumped to his death ten years prior, but she has never been able to open the envelope and read it.  She also witnessed one of the police officers, who is currently responding to the hostage crisis, when he helped her present-day psychologist, who at age nine intended to commit suicide by jumping from a bridge.  The police officer in his youth is the individual who kept the young psychologist from committing suicide.  And the connections and commonalities among eight hostages and a bank robber continue to be revealed throughout the remainder of the book.

Essentially, the book is about the interconnectedness of people.  It is also about how as a society we come across people each day and we do not know what is happening in their lives.  What we say or do may impact the actions that person does or does not take.  In a pandemic like we are living in today, people are especially anxious for all sorts of reasons.   Would it not make for a better world if we all were a bit more understanding and considerate toward people we meet whether they be a relative, an acquaintance, or stranger?  It's easy in this social media obsessed age to get wrapped up in ourselves:  our problems, our anxieties, our wants, our needs, etc.  Take time to recognize and lend some thoughtfulness to those you meet along your life journey.  You never know what a difference you might make in that person's life or how much you might have in common or in what ways you might be connected in the future.  This is one fabulous book by a quite insightful author.

Till my next review or reflection,

Grace (Amy)

  

Review: Healing: When A Nurse Becomes A Patient by Theresa Brown, RN

 Dear Lit Loves,

Happy New Year!  In December, I won a giveaway sponsored by GoodReads of the upcoming book release titled Healing:  When A Nurse Becomes A Patient by Theresa Brown, RN.  The "official" release date for the book is April 2022.  I wanted to read this book because Ms. Brown writes about her experience coping with cancer from a nurse's perspective.  And interestingly, she has experience as a nurse on a hospital bone marrow transplant unit as well as a hospice home health nurse.  Given my own experience with skin cancer and chronic illness along with being a caregiver/advocate for my dad who lost his battle with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma as well as witnessing my mom's experience with breast cancer, this book highly intrigued me.  And it did not disappoint.

Ms. Brown discovers what our health care system experience is like as a breast cancer patient as she already has broad experience as a nurse within the U.S. health care system.  Not only does the book give a sharp-focused summary of the diagnostics and treatment of breast cancer, but it weaves in some of Ms. Brown's experiences as a nurse treating cancer patients as well.  From the initial suspicious mammogram to a breast biopsy, breast surgery, radiation treatment, and aftercare following treatment for breast cancer, the reader gets a firsthand look at what it is like to be diagnosed and treated for breast cancer.  Ms. Brown discovers throughout her cancer journey that our U.S. health care system often lacks compassionate oncology personnel.  From a radiologist who tells the author that the breast mass looks mean to having to wait over a long holiday weekend for biopsy results that are readily available, the reader sees how once a patient receives a cancer diagnosis, that individual's world is tipped over and spinning precariously while everyone else in the world goes about their business because they did not just have their world rocked by a cancer diagnosis.  

Oncology departments are places no one wants to find themselves.  If your cancer treatment involves radiation, you likely will be visiting a radiation oncology department in the basement of a cancer center or hospital.  It's the medical personnel who stop to acknowledge the seriousness of the patient's diagnosis and the fatigue of treatment that often mean the most to cancer patients.  Whether you are a nurse, teacher, corporate CEO, college student, VP of marketing, or truck driver, life changes drastically once you are diagnosed as a cancer patient.  When cancer comes knocking at your front door, your reality gets shaken like a snow globe.  You never forget that moment.  Often a cancer diagnosis feels like a sucker-punch to the stomach and a forearm hitting you in the face.  Cells within your body have gone rogue and it's time to find the best medical oncologist, surgical oncologist, and quite often radiation oncologist.  Cancer patients discover a new reality of medical terms, testing procedures, and treatment plans that are foreign to them and yet, it's time to get ready to step up to the plate and proceed or not with treatment.

For Ms. Brown, the pink associated with breast cancer fundraising is stereotypical almost delegating breast cancer as "only" a female cancer.  We all know that men can experience breast cancer as well.  Breast cancer is more than the color pink.  Breast cancer diagnosis happens all year long and not just the month of October when you often see massive pink campaigns as fundraising is elevated for research and care.  And for Ms. Brown, having breast cancer is not so much a war whereby her body is invaded by foreign aggressors; it is more that suddenly the cells within her own body decided to become negatively activated and then started reproducing incredibly fast with dangerous implications.

Finally, I liked that Ms. Brown addressed how her experience as a cancer patient affected her as she resumed working as a home hospice nurse.  It gave her a whole new perspective on what cancer patients and their families are experiencing when hospice arrives.  And I think Ms. Brown addressed the ambiguity of calling herself a "cancer survivor" if as a patient you are tested on a regular basis to determine if a cancer has recurred.  There is always a constant uneasiness each and every time a cancer patient undergoes blood tests, mammograms as well as CT or PET scans.  Cancer patients always have a nagging notion or worry of is this the test that will demonstrate that a cancer has returned for another round in the ring?

I admired the book and thought it was well-written.  Some of the chapters were quite short compared to others and occasionally the book chapters alternated back and forth between the author's experience with breast cancer versus a memory from her years as an oncology nurse.  For me, I found myself wanting one cohesive story of the breast cancer experience. I found myself often wanting to read about what happened next regarding her cancer experience as opposed to a brief reflection on working as an oncology nurse, but to me as a writer I feel that may have been more of an editing decision than a writer's decision.  I would highly recommend this book!

Till my next review,

Grace (Amy)