Review: Somebody's Daughter: A Memoir by Ashley C. Ford

 Dear Lit Loves,

Most recently I read Somebody's Daughter:  A Memoir by Ashley C. Ford and it was a story so well-voiced, it took me about a week to process all that happened to this young black female.  Have you ever read what you know to be a true story and afterward wanted to reach through the book and hug the person who not only survived in the book, but also took the opportunity to write their truth?  That is where I found myself with this particular book.  Profoundly stunning.  And it takes a book of deafening significance to shake me to my soul, particularly when it comes to the memoir genre.

The core of the book revolves around Ashley, a four-year-old black girl living with her mom in Indiana.  Her dad has been sent to prison and she only knows of him through his sporadic letters to her.  The reader witnesses how Ashley and her mom and brother live without him.  Most of her family lives within four miles of each other.  Ashley grows up in a household with quite a bit of drama.  Her mom works several jobs, has various boyfriends, and attempts to do right by her children but often causes Ashley to live in fear of her mother.  She wonders if she can ever do or be right in the eyes of her mom.  Puberty brings a feeling of isolation for Ashley and a whole mountain of uncertainty about who she is and where she belongs.  Ashley's grandmother is the one pillar of strength and stability in Ashley's life.  I think the one person who Ashley knew loved her was her grandmother.  She lived with her grandmother for a portion of her life and they have an unshakeable bond.  The remainder of the story revolves around what happens when Ashley learns of the crime her dad committed, what she will do with her life beyond high school, her tension-filled relationship with her mom, and confronting reality when her grandmother is hospitalized and her father is released from prison.  

The most riveting moments in this book for me are when Ashley decides to go visit her father in prison and when she is called to return home to Indiana by her mom due to her grandmother's illness.  I have always believed throughout life that our life experiences give shape to our character.  Whether it is noticing you are one of the only people in your class that has no computer or wondering if you are ever going to be loved and understood by your mom, we are all marked in life by our highs and our lows.  Whatever you have experienced in life whether it be a health crisis, a relative being imprisoned, life as a single mom, losing someone you love, or just trying to put one foot in front of the other when you are staggering due to the weight of life itself, we are all changed in some way by our experiences.  Experiences matter whether they be peaks or valleys, including the way we are treated, how we treat others, who we love and who loves us as well as those people who were the light in the midst of a hurricane that may have engulfed us.  These all combine to make us the individuals we are from birth till death.  Ashley Ford's book is her truth, her experiences, and what we can and should learn from both as she relates them to the reader in such a realistic, brilliant manner.

If there were one central message that I could say I walked away with after reading this moving memoir, it is the importance of remembering we often do not know what realities other people are facing so tread carefully when interacting with others.  Be mindful of how your words and actions could impact others.  And never forget when rearing a child, teaching a child, or just being a relative to a child to always communicate what the nanny in the book, The Help, communicated to the little ones she cared for and that is:  You are good. You are loved.  You are important.  

This book is incredibly thought-provoking and without a doubt well-written.  Thank you, Ms. Ford for pulling back the curtain on your life, your survival, and your truths.  May we finish your book and find ourselves with a little more hope for our world and the people in it.  

A highly recommended book and one I give a five star rating.

Best,

Grace (Amy)

P.S.  I will be away over the next couple of weeks due to the need to have surgery to help heal a new glaucoma discovered in my left eye.  I shall and intend to return.  And I am always with my readers in spirit.  Truly, Grace (Amy)