Dear Lit Loves,
Wow. I am impressed to finally see that traditional and small publishers are opening their minds and including the thoughts and experiences of women who are writing in the narrative/memoir genres about chronic disease, illness, and in some cases, death. Currently, I am reading The Unwinding of the Miracle written by Julie Yip-Williams regarding her experiences with stage four colon cancer. I think it is high time that the world of publishing open its doors and windows to writers about these topics because let's face it, eventually, we're all going to face some sort of death and many of us will face a diagnosis at some point in our lives of a chronic, life-long illness. And if you do not personally experience a diagnosis like this, I bet either a parent, sibling, friend, acquaintance, coworker, etc. will encounter a time when he/she is diagnosed with chronic disease. I did. And I was only age eighteen at the time. Talk about feeling like your life is at the stage of : GAME OVER. Fortunately, for me, I never settled for the mindset of negativity once I received a diagnosis of chronic illness; I decided the best direction and course for me was to learn how to ADAPT.
Yes, I was watching the North Carolina men's basketball team play Clemson on Saturday evening March 2nd, 2019 when the coach, Roy Williams, suddenly turned quickly and then immediately went down to one knee and then promptly took a swift dive into the lap of one of his assistant coaches. I recognized what was happening to him. It was VERTIGO. I know because I have experienced these episodes on many occasions as I have lived with the chronic illness known as Meniere's disease for well over thirty years.
When vertigo overcomes your body it feels like everything in your visual spectrum is spinning as if you have suddenly jumped on the carnival ride known as the spinning teacups from hell. In other words, for me, it is not that I am spinning, but everything in my visual field is spinning and continuing to spin at a higher and higher rate of speed. So you know what happens? You fall over, grab a wall, grab a chair, drop to the floor, or get to a seated position as soon as possible. I was impressed Roy Williams was able to walk off the court with help from coaching staff as I would have been on my hands and knees crawling to the locker room, sprawled on the floor, and trying to find the nearest waste basket as vertigo usually involves regurgitation when it happens to me.
When I first began experiencing symptoms of vertigo and Meniere's disease, I had no clue what was happening to me. Initially, I thought I was dying. My left ear would have siren-like ringing, my hearing was off in the left ear for a few days prior, and then at some point I would find myself start sweating profusely and begin seeing the world in my field of vision begin spinning. I might be on the floor with a waste basket for ten or twelve hours just dry heaving or regurgitating what looked like anything I had eaten in the last week. Eventually, the spinning would slow and finally stop. I was so thankful when I finally received a diagnosis and medication for my vertigo episodes, I actually wanted to do cartwheels.
Over the years, I have tried various medication regimens for the disease. I knew that as I kept experiencing these volatile vertigo episodes I was losing the cilia in my inner ear that help me achieve balance. Three years ago I was informed that 97% of the cells governing balance in my left ear are essentially dead. Gone. So when I stand anywhere I am essentially balancing myself via the near perfect hearing and balance that I have thanks to my right inner ear which has never developed Meniere's disease. That was a shell-shocker when I was given that news.
There are various surgeries a person can have to essentially bring a stop to any further vertigo episodes, but many of those surgeries and treatments often subvert an individual's balance ability along with the vertigo. I chose to endure the vertigo and not have anyone deliberately incapacitate the cells that govern my balance. And I have endured. And now I have vertigo sparingly and when it does occur, I am maybe seeing my world spin for about thirty minutes and then the whole episode is over and I recover and continue on with my life. My medical specialist believes that my Meniere's disease is in a dormant stage as I have had fewer and fewer episodes of vertigo as I have aged and lived with the disease. I will tell you that the disease taught me to learn to adapt to the resolute possibility that my health can go plunging southward at a moment's notice. The whole experience of this chronic illness has given me confounding and enlightening interactions with our medical system in this country. And I know what to do if and when a vertigo episode strikes. I'm always prepared as I always have my medication with me and some meds I take daily to prevent vertigo.
The best part about Meniere's disease is that I learned how to advocate for myself as a female patient in what was an often patriarchal medical world. That is swiftly changing now as more women are going into medicine than men. I learned that I am the only one who can advocate for my health and the quality of healthcare I receive and from whom I receive it. For me, respect is earned and not automatically given because hey, even in the world of medicine, not every medical specialist graduated at the top of their class and many medical specialists I have encountered have the interpersonal skills of a skunk. Thus, I have also learned how to size up and evaluate each and every medical specialist I encounter even when it comes to one that is treating my parent or a close friend.
I would like to one day be able to share my experiences regarding Meniere's disease and two other chronic diseases I have with the reading public. I hope traditional and small publishers continue to give individuals like myself an opportunity to do this as you would be amazed what you can learn from a person who has been there and experienced that when it comes to any disease or illness. I am a person and patient who would rather know what I am dealing with as opposed to live in denial or submit to the concept that ignorance is bliss. Knowledge is power, people. Especially when it comes to your health.
Till my next post,
Grace
(Amy)
Tuesday, March 5, 2019
Monday, February 18, 2019
Lessons From Reading A Badly Written Memoir
Dear Lit Loves,
I tend to post reviews of books in the memoir genre that are outstanding or particularly well-written. So it was with great surprise that I recently read a memoir written by a self-proclaimed celebrity that just went off the train tracks and never recovered. The book dealt with the serious issue of chronic illness. Since I had recently been diagnosed with a form of the autoimmune illness about which the book's author wrote, I thought surely the book I bought would help guide me on my journey with several chronic illnesses and especially the disease I share with the author. I thought surely I would be able to identify and sympathize with the author, but no such luck. Actually, I wanted to go get my money back after ordering the book via Amazon and thankfully, I did not pay the full price for this book at another book retailer. After finishing the book, I was incredulous that it had been published after I have spent years writing manuscripts on some serious subjects that were never picked up by a literary agent or acquiring editor. In this particular instance when I completed reading the book, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that publishing is most definitely not a fair game. Frankly, I think publishing is more about who you know, what level of celebrity status you have, and how much of a social media platform you have obtained.
Sometimes, in my own publishing journey, I have been enormously frustrated with literary agents, editors, etc. who continually shout from the rooftops that they want diversity in publishing and more female points of view; however, if you query them as I have, you often receive no response or if you send them a small portion of the manuscript and a forty page book proposal they'll tell you to wait six to eight weeks and at the end of that time period you receive a one sentence email saying they have no idea where to place the book or that they could not connect to the material. Upon reading this latest memoir, I wanted to hold up my latest regretfully read book purchase and say, "This is why the publishing industry continues to shrink and sales are sluggish. If this is the best publishing can do by way of memoir, the industry may hit the skids in a New York minute." And after I continually looked pitifully at the book and carefully considered its contents, it finally dawned on me that by God, there really is something to learn from a quite badly written memoir.
Lessons Learned After Reading A Badly Written Memoir:
1) Solidly written memoir for me must contain authenticity of experience. It's not about spouting off opinions in each and every chapter or demeaning a group of people or jumping from one topic to another with no interconnection.
2) Memoir should have a theme sewn through its pages.
3) Edit. Edit. Edit. And edit once again after you receive an advanced copy of your memoir. There is no going back once the official published button is pressed.
4) Not all literary agents, editors, or publishing houses are equal.
5) Check your arrogance as a writer/author at the door when it comes to memoir. Memoir is about vulnerability and reality. It is not the arena to act as a preacher or know-it-all.
6) In my opinion, unless you are a well-known celebrity or a household name, I would not use a picture of myself on the cover of my manuscript or book. Preferably utilize a symbol associated with the book's theme.
7) Never include juvenile, inappropriate illustrations or pictures in a memoir as it just makes a writer look juvenile and unprofessional.
8) If you can't write about a serious topic in a respectful, informative, and meaningful manner then put down the pen or pencil and step away from the computer.
9) Memoir is generally not the place to practice a comedy routine.
10) For heaven's sake, at least be well-read in the genre you choose to utilize as a writer/author.
Till my next post,
Grace
(Amy)
I tend to post reviews of books in the memoir genre that are outstanding or particularly well-written. So it was with great surprise that I recently read a memoir written by a self-proclaimed celebrity that just went off the train tracks and never recovered. The book dealt with the serious issue of chronic illness. Since I had recently been diagnosed with a form of the autoimmune illness about which the book's author wrote, I thought surely the book I bought would help guide me on my journey with several chronic illnesses and especially the disease I share with the author. I thought surely I would be able to identify and sympathize with the author, but no such luck. Actually, I wanted to go get my money back after ordering the book via Amazon and thankfully, I did not pay the full price for this book at another book retailer. After finishing the book, I was incredulous that it had been published after I have spent years writing manuscripts on some serious subjects that were never picked up by a literary agent or acquiring editor. In this particular instance when I completed reading the book, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that publishing is most definitely not a fair game. Frankly, I think publishing is more about who you know, what level of celebrity status you have, and how much of a social media platform you have obtained.
Sometimes, in my own publishing journey, I have been enormously frustrated with literary agents, editors, etc. who continually shout from the rooftops that they want diversity in publishing and more female points of view; however, if you query them as I have, you often receive no response or if you send them a small portion of the manuscript and a forty page book proposal they'll tell you to wait six to eight weeks and at the end of that time period you receive a one sentence email saying they have no idea where to place the book or that they could not connect to the material. Upon reading this latest memoir, I wanted to hold up my latest regretfully read book purchase and say, "This is why the publishing industry continues to shrink and sales are sluggish. If this is the best publishing can do by way of memoir, the industry may hit the skids in a New York minute." And after I continually looked pitifully at the book and carefully considered its contents, it finally dawned on me that by God, there really is something to learn from a quite badly written memoir.
Lessons Learned After Reading A Badly Written Memoir:
1) Solidly written memoir for me must contain authenticity of experience. It's not about spouting off opinions in each and every chapter or demeaning a group of people or jumping from one topic to another with no interconnection.
2) Memoir should have a theme sewn through its pages.
3) Edit. Edit. Edit. And edit once again after you receive an advanced copy of your memoir. There is no going back once the official published button is pressed.
4) Not all literary agents, editors, or publishing houses are equal.
5) Check your arrogance as a writer/author at the door when it comes to memoir. Memoir is about vulnerability and reality. It is not the arena to act as a preacher or know-it-all.
6) In my opinion, unless you are a well-known celebrity or a household name, I would not use a picture of myself on the cover of my manuscript or book. Preferably utilize a symbol associated with the book's theme.
7) Never include juvenile, inappropriate illustrations or pictures in a memoir as it just makes a writer look juvenile and unprofessional.
8) If you can't write about a serious topic in a respectful, informative, and meaningful manner then put down the pen or pencil and step away from the computer.
9) Memoir is generally not the place to practice a comedy routine.
10) For heaven's sake, at least be well-read in the genre you choose to utilize as a writer/author.
Till my next post,
Grace
(Amy)
Sunday, January 6, 2019
Book Review: Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover
,Dear Lit Loves,
Greetings! Wow! Somebody Ring The Liberty Bell and fellow readers if you were here we should all bust a move doing an imitation of dance to the song, "Thriller" because I just read Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover and I am here to say this book is as good if not better than the much-acclaimed memoir titled The Glass Castle! That's right. You heard it here first. Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover was published by Random House and the literary agents representing Tara Westover are Anna Stein and Karolina Sutton. This is a MUST READ book and it also won Goodreads Memoir of the Year!
Tara Westover was raised on a mountain in Idaho by survivalist parents. Her father owned a junkyard where he felt his children should work as opposed to attend school as he does not trust "book knowledge" or "any form of government". Tara's mom at one point is a self-taught midwife, but eventually she becomes a medicinal zealot who does not trust doctors or the medical establishment; instead, she uses her herbs and oils to concoct tinctures to heal all sorts of ailments. Tara and her siblings know there is something not quite right with their father, but do not know exactly what to label it. He regularly holds home meetings where he preaches his interpretation of his bible. He quite often places his own children in precarious and downright dangerous circumstances as they work for him either constructing barns or breaking down metal scraps from his large junkyard heap. This leads to several of his children getting burned, scarred, and worse. Tara's paternal grandparents live down the hill from the family home. They have a second residence in Arizona where they relocate each winter. When Tara's family goes to visit them in Arizona on one occasion, her father insists on driving home to Idaho in a severe winter storm. Sometimes he forces his underage children to drive in precarious weather. At one point, the family van is upside down in a ditch with power lines draped across the van. Tara's mom was never quite the same after this accident as she did not receive proper medical help and suffered major injuries.
Eventually, Tara begins to acquire money from not just her junkyard work, but bagging groceries at the grocery store as well as babysitting. She buys textbooks like her brother to essentially teach herself enough in order to achieve a passing score on the ACT and then leaves for BYU. While at BYU, she realizes how different she is from her fellow roommates and classmates. She recognizes that some of what her father and mother told her about American history is not as they portrayed it. And some movements in history such as the civil rights movement, women's suffrage, etc., she does not know anything about as she has never heard of them. Eventually, a professor encourages her to visit Cambridge and she does. She applies for admission upon her graduation from BYU and though she is initially not accepted; her professor pleads her case for her and she does get the opportunity to study at Cambridge. She earns her Master's in Philosopy from Cambridge and spends a year writing the first chapter of her dissertation at Harvard. In the midst of this, she returns home to a brother who threatens her, a mother who does not protect her, and a sister who was also abused by the same brother, but the father threatens to disown the sister if she keeps bringing up the violence enacted by the brother. Eventually,Tara's sister agrees that her father is right. She and Tara must have gotten mixed up about what happened. Tara's sister does not want to be disowned by her family so she agrees with them that Tara is evil and just trying to stir up trouble for the family. When Tara's parents come to Harvard to "save" her from the evil of socialist intellectualism, Tara must decide for herself if she wants to commit to her way of life and beliefs and renounce her parents' beliefs and values while subsequently facing the prospect of being disowned by her family. It is enough to send her into a nervous breakdown which she must overcome if she is to finish her research and dissertation to obtain her Doctorate's degree from Cambridge.
This book touched on so many themes for me such as parental abuse and neglect. Obviously, the father was a control-freak and fanatic anti-government rebel who did not send his kids to school nor did he seek professional medical care for his own children when they suffered numerous serious injuries. The mother believes the same as the father and will not stand up to him. She believes she has the healing tinctures and salves and herbs to cure whatever ailment may befall the children. As a reader, I kept thinking to myself, does anyone in the extended family or anyone in the community not realize that there is something inherently wrong within this family? Why does no one report what is observed regarding this family? Does anyone of the outside looking in not have an inkling that something is very wrong with this set of parents and the kind of life they are forcing upon their children? Does anyone suspect one or both of the parents may have mental illness??
There is also the reality of sibling love and admiration, but also sibling volatility that the parents refuse to acknowledge. One incident occurs in a grocery store parking lot and violence is quite evident, but no one calls the police or reports what they have witnessed. No one bothers to help Tara as she is being hurt and tortured. It is troubling to me to think of a scenario like the ones described in this book. And eventually the siblings who did obtain a collegiate education keep in touch with Tara, but the ones that did stay loyal to the family regard Tara as evil and refuse to acknowledge or keep in touch with her.
Next, there is the question of a young girl and female adult having to choose between getting an education which her father and mother abhor or remaining loyal to the family by denying herself a broader view of the world via a higher level of education. What kind of courage must it have taken for this young woman to stand up to a condescending, fanatical father and a mother who complies with the father's beliefs and actions?
And what about the professors and educators at college who upon learning of Tara's history and background choose to extend a hand to help lift her above her circumstances to give her an opportunity for a better life than what she has experienced as a child? I applaud them for the instinct and endeavors to assist her as opposed to just think of her as another student among many.
And I applaud Tara for her ultimate decision to transform herself and her life along with her beliefs and values knowing what it would ultimately cost her. She chose to transform herself and her life even though it cost her connections with her father, mother, and four siblings who choose to adhere to the parents' way of life, customs, beliefs, and values. It made me wonder how many of us could survive and do what Tara did? How many of us have that kind of perseverance and tenacity? And would it not be admirable if more people had the kind of courage Tara exhibits? Would our world not be a better place??
Once again this book is a must-read. I highly recommend it for book clubs and I know it would be required reading if I were still teaching today just because it takes a look at real life in all its rawness and ugliness but equally its possibilities and complexities.
Till my next review or update,
Grace
(Amy)
Greetings! Wow! Somebody Ring The Liberty Bell and fellow readers if you were here we should all bust a move doing an imitation of dance to the song, "Thriller" because I just read Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover and I am here to say this book is as good if not better than the much-acclaimed memoir titled The Glass Castle! That's right. You heard it here first. Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover was published by Random House and the literary agents representing Tara Westover are Anna Stein and Karolina Sutton. This is a MUST READ book and it also won Goodreads Memoir of the Year!
Tara Westover was raised on a mountain in Idaho by survivalist parents. Her father owned a junkyard where he felt his children should work as opposed to attend school as he does not trust "book knowledge" or "any form of government". Tara's mom at one point is a self-taught midwife, but eventually she becomes a medicinal zealot who does not trust doctors or the medical establishment; instead, she uses her herbs and oils to concoct tinctures to heal all sorts of ailments. Tara and her siblings know there is something not quite right with their father, but do not know exactly what to label it. He regularly holds home meetings where he preaches his interpretation of his bible. He quite often places his own children in precarious and downright dangerous circumstances as they work for him either constructing barns or breaking down metal scraps from his large junkyard heap. This leads to several of his children getting burned, scarred, and worse. Tara's paternal grandparents live down the hill from the family home. They have a second residence in Arizona where they relocate each winter. When Tara's family goes to visit them in Arizona on one occasion, her father insists on driving home to Idaho in a severe winter storm. Sometimes he forces his underage children to drive in precarious weather. At one point, the family van is upside down in a ditch with power lines draped across the van. Tara's mom was never quite the same after this accident as she did not receive proper medical help and suffered major injuries.
Eventually, Tara begins to acquire money from not just her junkyard work, but bagging groceries at the grocery store as well as babysitting. She buys textbooks like her brother to essentially teach herself enough in order to achieve a passing score on the ACT and then leaves for BYU. While at BYU, she realizes how different she is from her fellow roommates and classmates. She recognizes that some of what her father and mother told her about American history is not as they portrayed it. And some movements in history such as the civil rights movement, women's suffrage, etc., she does not know anything about as she has never heard of them. Eventually, a professor encourages her to visit Cambridge and she does. She applies for admission upon her graduation from BYU and though she is initially not accepted; her professor pleads her case for her and she does get the opportunity to study at Cambridge. She earns her Master's in Philosopy from Cambridge and spends a year writing the first chapter of her dissertation at Harvard. In the midst of this, she returns home to a brother who threatens her, a mother who does not protect her, and a sister who was also abused by the same brother, but the father threatens to disown the sister if she keeps bringing up the violence enacted by the brother. Eventually,Tara's sister agrees that her father is right. She and Tara must have gotten mixed up about what happened. Tara's sister does not want to be disowned by her family so she agrees with them that Tara is evil and just trying to stir up trouble for the family. When Tara's parents come to Harvard to "save" her from the evil of socialist intellectualism, Tara must decide for herself if she wants to commit to her way of life and beliefs and renounce her parents' beliefs and values while subsequently facing the prospect of being disowned by her family. It is enough to send her into a nervous breakdown which she must overcome if she is to finish her research and dissertation to obtain her Doctorate's degree from Cambridge.
This book touched on so many themes for me such as parental abuse and neglect. Obviously, the father was a control-freak and fanatic anti-government rebel who did not send his kids to school nor did he seek professional medical care for his own children when they suffered numerous serious injuries. The mother believes the same as the father and will not stand up to him. She believes she has the healing tinctures and salves and herbs to cure whatever ailment may befall the children. As a reader, I kept thinking to myself, does anyone in the extended family or anyone in the community not realize that there is something inherently wrong within this family? Why does no one report what is observed regarding this family? Does anyone of the outside looking in not have an inkling that something is very wrong with this set of parents and the kind of life they are forcing upon their children? Does anyone suspect one or both of the parents may have mental illness??
There is also the reality of sibling love and admiration, but also sibling volatility that the parents refuse to acknowledge. One incident occurs in a grocery store parking lot and violence is quite evident, but no one calls the police or reports what they have witnessed. No one bothers to help Tara as she is being hurt and tortured. It is troubling to me to think of a scenario like the ones described in this book. And eventually the siblings who did obtain a collegiate education keep in touch with Tara, but the ones that did stay loyal to the family regard Tara as evil and refuse to acknowledge or keep in touch with her.
Next, there is the question of a young girl and female adult having to choose between getting an education which her father and mother abhor or remaining loyal to the family by denying herself a broader view of the world via a higher level of education. What kind of courage must it have taken for this young woman to stand up to a condescending, fanatical father and a mother who complies with the father's beliefs and actions?
And what about the professors and educators at college who upon learning of Tara's history and background choose to extend a hand to help lift her above her circumstances to give her an opportunity for a better life than what she has experienced as a child? I applaud them for the instinct and endeavors to assist her as opposed to just think of her as another student among many.
And I applaud Tara for her ultimate decision to transform herself and her life along with her beliefs and values knowing what it would ultimately cost her. She chose to transform herself and her life even though it cost her connections with her father, mother, and four siblings who choose to adhere to the parents' way of life, customs, beliefs, and values. It made me wonder how many of us could survive and do what Tara did? How many of us have that kind of perseverance and tenacity? And would it not be admirable if more people had the kind of courage Tara exhibits? Would our world not be a better place??
Once again this book is a must-read. I highly recommend it for book clubs and I know it would be required reading if I were still teaching today just because it takes a look at real life in all its rawness and ugliness but equally its possibilities and complexities.
Till my next review or update,
Grace
(Amy)
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