Review: LadyParts: A Memoir by Deborah Copaken

 Dear Lit Loves,

Greetings!  Today I am reviewing the new memoir titled LadyParts by Deborah Copaken.  Ms. Copaken is also the author of the memoir Shutterbabe which mesmerized audiences with her revelations of what life is like for a female war photographer and journalist.  Ms. Copaken also authored The Red Book as well as Between Here and April.  She was a contributing writer to The Atlantic and a TV writer on Emily in Paris. Her column, "When Cupid Is a Prying Journalist"  was adapted for the Modern Love streaming series. 

In LadyParts:  A Memoir Ms. Copaken shines a light on resilience when as a single mom she finds herself dropping from the middle class without a safety net once confronted with the following:   a prolonged divorce from a man who has the sympathetic nature of a copperhead snake; paying for rent and adult child college tuitions when an ex-husband moves thousands of miles away and provides zero child support;  attempting to find employment when women are often underpaid and often toil in harsh work environments,  trying to secure healthcare insurance in between jobs via COBRA benefits; and last but not least, attempting to obtain a work/life balance when the corporate world only presents job opportunities to women that frequently include indifference to responsibilities a woman has as a mom, penalizes working women for taking time away from work to address personal and child medical ailments, discombobulated work environments that cause stress and lead to insecurities and a work world where sexual harassment and not being paid fairly or given credit for the work you create are often the norm.   If I were teaching a class titled The Fine Art of Being A Feminist, this book would be required reading.  

Talk about ever evolving turbulent periods in a life, Ms. Copaken certainly writes about navigating life's ups and downs when she finally decided to divorce her husband and not settle for less than she deserves when it comes to romantic relationships, utilizing creative ways to pay the rent and put food on the table, navigating finding a living space in New York City while dealing with shady landlords, keeping up tuition payments for her children's college educations with no assistance from their father, navigating adverse health crises when uninsured or waiting to acquire health insurance during a probationary period at a new job, and blowing the whistle on individuals in the workforce who try to strip women of the power to provide for themselves and obtain gainful employment without having to endure sexual harassment in the process.  

As a writer, Ms. Copaken had the incredible opportunity to befriend the late Nora Ephron who lived by her words, "Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim."   Ms. Copaken learned that lesson well and translated it in part via the memoir titled LadyParts.  This book reveals a woman who was determined to survive and thrive though life kept emitting mortar fire at her no mater which way she turned.  The process enabled her to build a no-nonsense ethical ability when it comes to her professional and personal life.  She learned quickly what she would not settle for in a significant other and she learned how to gracefully navigate indifferent corporate work environments and blow the whistle when it comes to sexual harassment in the workplace whether you are a freelancer, consultant, or full-time, site-based employee.

This is a powerful memoir that I have been waiting to see on bookshelves since I navigated those same shark-infested corporate and academic waters many years ago.  As a woman, you owe it to yourself to ensure that you are paid fairly for the work you choose to do, to be able to live a decent life and obtain affordable and well-managed healthcare, and to not tolerate sexual harassment of any sort by blowing the whistle on people who choose to engage in it.  Be the heroine that more women today need to see and hear so others can orchestrate achieving the benefit of being the heroine of their own life story.  

Bravo, Ms. Copaken!  A job well-done!  I highly recommend the book titled LadyParts:  A Memoir by Deborah Copaken.  

Till my next review, adventure, or tirade!

All Best,

Grace  (aka Amy)

What My Dad Would Say To His Beloved Atlanta Braves If He Were Here Today

 Dear Readers,

Today I have to diverge from my usual book reviews, publishing adventures, and medical commentary.  I generally do not have many readers or followers of this blog in the first place; however, it is not for lack of trying.  Today I need to write a blog post to the Atlanta Braves players who will be suiting up tonight for their first World Series game since 1999.  God Rest His Soul, my father was the biggest, most loyal Atlanta Braves fan.  In good times and bad times, dad never wavered from supporting his Braves.  He used to come visit me when I lived in Duluth, GA and attend games at Turner Field.  One of the last days before my dad passed away from anaplastic large cell lymphoma, my family and I sat with him in his ICU hospital room.  We were all having lunch together and dad was digging into Carolina barbecue, slaw, and hushpuppies with all of us.  His hospital room television was set to a game featuring the Atlanta Braves.  The pitcher that day was at the time a young Alex Woods who my dad was certain had a stellar career ahead of him.  I had just moved back to the Triangle region of North Carolina six months prior to Sunday, June 7th, 2015.  Dad was wearing his Braves cap per usual even in the midst of dying while hospitalized in an Intensive Care Unit.  As a family that was the last game featuring the Atlanta Braves that we would ever watch with my father.  Dad died Tuesday June 9th, 2015 at six in the morning.

I had been keeping up with this 2021 baseball season when I had the time and my mom was most definitely watching almost every Braves game.  Mom is most happy when she watches the Atlanta Braves as she used to do with my dad religiously.  Recently, I was not sure if the Atlanta Braves could beat the Dodgers to advance to the World Series.  I could not watch the games because I was afraid if I did, I might jinx the chances of the Braves advancing to the World Series in 2021.  Saturday night October 23rd, 2021, I went to bed early, but I knew the game was tied.  I fell asleep only to wake at four in the morning.  I checked ESPN to see what happened in the game.  The Braves had won the game and were headed to the World Series.  I stared at my laptop and chills came over me.  I looked heavenward as I knew my dad most likely was watching over the Braves from heaven and coaching them like usual from his recliner in heaven.  I turned on my cell phone and text my mom and brother that the Atlanta Braves were going to the World Series.  They finally received the news early Sunday morning.  Both were elated.  

Braves players, this is what my dad, a former softball coach himself, would say to you if he were here today:

Brothers, we are headed to play the Houston Astros in Texas.  Your playing skills have been tweaked this year and we are blessed to have landed in the World Series.  It has been a hell of a year.  We have walked through many valleys and climbed many mountains.  Above all, we are here to play ball.  We will leave everything we have on the field because that is where we do our jobs and our talking.  I know what the oddsmakers say and I do not care one bit.  We as a team determine our odds on the field one game at a time.  So pack your game face and do not forget to bring your "A" game.  Be there for one another as you have this entire season.  No matter what happens, we earned the right to be here and for that we are grateful.  Now, Go Out There And Work Those Bats, Play Like Your Life Depends On It, and Let The Chips Fall Where They May!  OOH RAH!

God Speed Atlanta Braves.  Daddy will be watching from above in heaven.  Mom, my brother and me will be watching the magic from home.

All Best,

Amy 

aka Grace Sutherlin (pen name)

Review: Hamnet: A Novel of the Plague by Maggie O'Farrell

 Greetings Lit Loves,

This month the book club I attend here in Cary, North Carolina selected to read the book titled Hamnet:  A Novel of the Plague by Maggie O'Farrell which became a national bestseller.  This book takes a fictional look at the life and death of Shakespeare's only son, Hamnet, who died at age eleven in 1596.  Interestingly, the book additionally takes a look at Shakespeare's dysfunctional family inclusive of an alcoholic father who can be abusive to his wife and children and his mother, Mary, who tends to the family home in Stratford, Warwickshire England.  Shakespeare, in this book, was depicted as having a sister named Eliza and several brothers as well.  The book opens with Shakespeare as a Latin tutor of pupils in his hometown and also his courting his eventual wife, Anne or Agnes, Hathaway who grew up learning the medicinal value of herbs, flowers, and plants from her biological mom and a contentious relationship much later with her stepmother, Joan.

Obviously, Shakespeare and Agnes marry to the dismay of both their families.  Agnes's brother, Bartholomew, is the one family member with whom she has a lifelong connection as he helps broker a deal such that Agnes and Shakespeare will have an apartment above Shakespeare's parents' home as opposed to living directly with them.  Agnes and Shakespeare go on to have three children including Susanna and later, Hamnet and Judith who are fraternal twins.  Agnes works with local townspeople who come to her home for tinctures and solvents for their various heath problems.  Eventually, Shakespeare leaves his family to extend his father's embroidered glove business in London, but really, he begins to write and stage plays in London.  While he is away, Judith falls ill with symptoms of the plague and a letter is sent to Shakespeare to come home directly.  Judith recovers and it is Hamnet, the son, who eventually dies of the plague.  Shakespeare does make it back home, but it is too late to say goodbye to his son.  He does participate in the burial of his son.  Following the burial, Shakespeare leaves once again to write and stage plays in London.  Eventually, he becomes so successful as a writing and staging plays that he buys his family a sizeable home and land in Stratford, Warwickshire England.  And he additionally goes on to write the play, Hamlet, which is often thought to be a tribute to his son, Hamnet.

I think this book demonstrates how easily a plague or pandemic can begin and spread like wildfire.  It also deals with the obvious issue of death, but also how people cope differently with the death of a loved one.  Agnes, Hamnet's mother, falls into a silent stupor and becomes reclusive.  Hamnet's fraternal twin, Judith, is emotionally traumatized by her brother's death and also is left wondering why she lived and he died of the plague.  Susanna, Shakespeare's oldest child, follows her paternal grandmother's lead by getting back to all of life's regular chores.  And Shakespeare copes through being away from his family and writing a play of great tragedy.

It is also interesting to notice the rituals involved when someone dies.  In this book, Hamnet  dies and his mother and grandmother prepare his body by first washing it with oils and water.  Then the body is placed in a powder white shroud which is stitched together once it is draped on the deceased's body.  All this occurs as Hamnet lies on the frame of a door which will be utilized to transport him through town to his burial ground.  Hamnet's mother even cuts a lock of his hair which she then keeps in a jar which resides on a mantel in the apartment.  Additionally, Agnes places lavender and other herbs and flowers around his body as he is readied for burial.  She is comforted that his burial site is beside a river as Hamnet loved water.  Hamnet's sister, Judith, decorates a portion of an attic space in the cookhouse where she and her brother used to hide from the rest of the family.  

Finally, this book displays the often strong bonds among siblings especially Agnes and her brother, Bartholomew.  Bartholomew looks out for his sister when she is married by ensuring she and Shakespeare have a small place of their own built above his parents' home that is completely for the two of them and their family.  Bartholomew is the one who finds Agnes and where she decided to go and have her first child, Susanna.  It was a place where they hid and played as children themselves.  Bartholomew is the one who consoles Agnes at the death of Hamnet and urges her to prepare his body for eventual burial.  And finally, Bartholomew is the one who Shakespeare asks to locate and buy a private, large home with land for his family.

I thought this was an excellent book.  I certainly thought the author depicted the time period and characters well through most likely diligent research.  It was not an easy read for me, especially the part where Hamnet dies and is buried, as it reminded me of the suffering my own family experienced when my father died.  And the book gave me some insight into the probable everyday life and experiences of Shakespeare and why he became the famous person that he will always be.  I highly recommend this book.

Till my next review,

Grace  (Amy)