Dear Lit Loves,
Greetings! Well, I will proudly let you know that I have let the North Carolina School Superintendent know about my book Brave Soul Rising: Tales From The Trenches of An Uncharmed Life as many readers as well as current and former teachers have asked me if I had brought the book to anyone's attention on our North Carolina Board Of Education. The superintendent did respond to my email and assured me he would be taking a look at the book as it addresses real life circumstances of my first year teaching experience in an inner city middle school in North Carolina. Sadly, other officials that I have contacted have not replied to my efforts to bring the book to their attention or at least they haven't as of April 6th 2017. I will be doing my dead level best to get word out about the book to many school principals in North Carolina as well as local chapter leaders for The North Carolina Association Of Educators.
Today, I expressly wanted to say that many of you may have heard that Mel B. of The Spice Girls has gotten a restraining order against her husband due to incidents of domestic violence over the course of their ten year marriage. Many folks already are aware I found myself in an abusive relationship at a young age, was married for five years, and finally had the courage to walk away from an unhealthy, toxic relationship. It's not easy. I know initially I felt scared witless, depressed, and ashamed that I did not leave the relationship sooner or recognize the signs of what many psychologists call a domestic violent personality. At the same time I felt relief that I no longer had to deal with being subjected to the living hell that comes with domestic violence. I had no children with my former spouse so thankfully, once the divorce was finalized I no longer was subjected to contact with him. The scars of domestic violence remain though and you have the long process of recovering and learning from what happened and how to avoid it in the future. Out of curiosity I checked for North Carolina Domestic Violence Statistics For 2016 on The North Carolina Coalition Against Domestic Violence website and realized this issue is still quite prevalent today and appears to straddle all socioeconomic boundaries. Take a look at the statistics for 2016 regarding incidences of domestic violence in North Carolina:
North Carolina Domestic Violence Statistics For The Year 2016
( I calculated most of the information from The North Carolina Coalition Against Domestic Violence website. Remember, these are just reported cases. Imagine how many more incidents occur weekly that are never reported.)
1) There were 66 murders classified as domestic violent homicides in N.C. for the year of 2016.
a) Of those 66 murders, there were 18 cases in which a female was killed by a boyfriend. The weapon most used in these cases included a firearm and knife.
b) There were 6 cases in which a female was killed by an ex-boyfriend. The primary weapons used were firearms, knives, and strangulation.
c) There were 17 reported cases of wives being killed by a husband. The weapons most used in these incidents again included firearms and knives.
d) There were a reported 8 cases in which husbands or boyfriends were killed by a wife or girlfriend. The weapons primarily used included firearms. Interestingly, there was also listed in this report that some deaths in these incidents were caused by unknown means.
e) There were 2 cases in which fathers killed their sons and the weapon used was a firearm.
f) There were 3 cases in which fathers killed a daughter or daughters mainly using a firearm and hammer.
g) We had 1 case in which a stepfather killed a stepdaughter utilizing both a firearm and knife as weapons.
h) North Carolina had 2 cases where a girlfriend killed a boyfriend by use of a firearm or knife.
i) There was 1 case in North Carolina in which a girlfriend killed her girlfriend and once again the weapon used in the incident was a firearm.
j) There were 7 North Carolina cases of male and female deceased victims who had no relation to the individual who committed a domestic violent murder. These were individuals who were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Of these 7 cases, 4 unrelated females were killed and 3 unrelated males were killed.
I don't know about you, but these are startling, horrific numbers to me. It is an issue I also address in my book because I was abused physically, emotionally, mentally, and financially in my prior marriage.. Thank God I was able to remove myself from a volatile relationship and move forward with my life. These numbers show many folks are not that lucky. So in my next post I want to take time to go over the warning signs/symptoms exhibited by a potentially domestic violent individual because we all need to be aware of this issue as it may not touch you personally, but you may have someone in your family, an acquaintance, a close friend, or a colleague who is experiencing domestic violence.
Till my next post,
Grace
(Amy)
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