Thursday, May 9, 2013

Author Advice: Get a Publisher and a Contract Attorney

Dear Literary Loves,

Dear God, I just about fell out of my leather writing chair while reading a bit article on The Huffington Post this morning by an acclaimed author.  He claims that agents are needed now more than ever by authors; however, he got screwed by his last agent when management changed hands and he received no further royalty payments.  Say WHAT?!  And another author friend of his was complaining about his own agent.  Even more incredulous after these wince-worthy stories were that he clearly feels a new author can't make it in today's publishing industry without a connected literary agent.  Can you say BOOOGGGUUUSSS!  I can!
Here's my two cents on this wayward traveler in the literary leagues:

1)  I have personally witnessed more unprofessional behavior among agents than while teaching middle school.  I think they are fairly equal to the grotesque behaviors I witnessed clerking at a startup tech company.  I'm serious; I kept a portfolio and copies of letters for proof.
2)  The writer of The Huffington Post bit goes on to say you as an author are not ready to play in the big leagues unless you are willing to swallow the 15% commission an agent makes on your book.  Are you freakin' kidding me?!  Have you seen some of the major authors who have taken to self-publishing these days?  Maybe it would do you good and make you more well-informed if you scouted those authors who are pulling a 70% royalty by going the do it yourself route.  Don't bad mouth them just because you're jealous now.  You know what the saying is:  If you can't beat them join them.  I assure you self-publishing is here to stay and even for the big hitters lovey.
3)  The Huffington Post writer then goes on to say that without agents there would be this vast literary wasteland of books.  Um, HELLOO?!!  Have you taken a serious look at what is coming off the printing presses these days at some publishing houses?  I swear I was in Barnes and Noble the other day and a woman browsing beside me says "Why the hell would any reputable publisher put out trash like this?"  And she was talking about a mainstream publisher darling.  I know because I checked the book's publisher after she walked away.  I've had the same feeling for some time now as I browse the new selections to choose from on publisher websites.
4)  Finally, the author of The Huffington Post bit says we new writers need a guide to the literary process; someone who "knows" people.  Hell, I've made more connections on my own sitting at my desk and working from my laptop.  Good writers know people because they know how to sell not just themselves, but their work.  By the way, I keep two little books.  One is red and in that book go names of editors and agents who I refuse to work with and the reasons for that choice.  In my pink book go the names of editors (very view agents; like maybe three) that I would entertain the idea of entrusting them to care for and help me revise my manuscript. 

And now for the literary update:  I have 7 publishers evaluating my book proposal and no darling, I don't have an agent, but I do have one hell of a pit bull contract attorney.  And guess what?  She bites!  Till next time loves!  Cranking INXS and having a delightful time on a Thursday!


No comments:

Post a Comment