Review: The Day My Brain Exploded: A True Story

First a summary:  A first generation Indian American man suffers a brain hemorrhage on his brother's wedding day in D.C.  He survives (barely) only to have to relearn how to walk, talk, and rediscover who he was before this tragedy as well as discover who he is following the traumatic brain injury. The repercussions he experiences following brain surgey include seizures, tongue gnashings, mood changes, forgetfulness, and visual distortions.  He never goes back to enjoying his original career in public relations, but also doesn't return to a life of alcoholism either.  There is a vivid depiction of his mother's devotion, his dad's catastrophic thinking and thriftiness, and his brother attempting to be the lind that holds this family together.  At times I found this narrator to be cynical and judgmental.  And it's hard to know at the book's end where his future lies.  Better yet, does he really appreciate and comprehend the extraordinary circumstances he survived?  Worse still, there were times while reading this book I'm not sure he's entirely glad to have recovered so dramatically or glad to be a survivor.

Also, I feel for the narrator's mother throughout this tragic ordeal because she blames herself for his traumatic brain injury because the type he suffered is generally congenital in nature and most likely formed while he was still in the womb.   There's no way she could have prevented this from happening.  The son eventually gets hostile with his mother and starts playing the blame game.  I just want to shake him and say "Deal With It Kiddo.  And Chill The Hell Out".  Most southern moms that I know wouldn't have put up with this type of behavior, and my dad, well, he would have drop-kicked this guy right on his behind for being so disrespectful of his mom.

 Also, the guy seems to let his dad's actions during and after the traumatic brain injury just slide.  The dad basically decides to pack up his son's apartment, vacate it without the son's knowledge, have all his belongings placed in boxes and then stored in a garage.  I found the penny-pinching dad's behavior throughout this book to be a lot like my ex-husband:  TOO FRUGAL FOR HIS OWN GOOD!

Also, as a former rural teacher I understand this guy's difficulty acclimating to a small, rural town in Illinois.  He's a first generation Indian American.  My question is why did his parents not make more of an effort to locate their home in a metropolitan area?  The author complains quite candidly about the bullying and discrimination he faces in small town America, but my feeling is:  Buddy, if you plant a rose among a patch of weeds, it's gonna stand out tremendously.  To be quite frank I endured more blunt and traumatizing forms of bullying and I grew up in a small town in my own country.  And no I am in no way belittling what he witnessed but, hey, I went through it too and I wasn't living in a foreign country!

The one part of this memoir I did identify with was the narrator's disappointing experience with the medical establishment in this country.  A nurse is abusive toward him, his surgeon refuses to explain the surgery to him and tells him to read the surgical report (good luck),  and some of the doctors appear to be randomly guessing at diagnoses for the side effects and treatments following a massive brain bleed.  I was left with the question of why there was no resolution for the grotesque visual distortions he experienced following the traumatic brain injury.  There's no way I would have accepted a doctor telling me "Well son, you just have to learn to live with it". 

Again, I am a critical memoir reviewer.  You really have to win me over not just with the drama you experienced, but with an empathetic voice and I found that lacking in this memoir.  So, you take your chances with reading this one and make up your own mind.